Why do you suppose people are Not going to church?

[thetaterkid]

Not going to church? My Dad has been a pastor for several churches, both small and medium sized. My understanding is from what I've experienced in those churches and churches I've attended since being on my own.

1) Sunday & Wednesday nights can be boring. Boring bible study, ho-hum singing, much clock watching and yawning.

2) Services
A. boring music, boring preaching
B. good music, boring preaching
C. boring music, good preaching
People want and desire balance.

3) Unfriendly to visitors.

4) "If you are a member of this church you better"...be at all services Sunday. Visitation Monday. Missions meeting on Tuesday. Prayer service on Wednesday. Co. meeting on Thursday. Family night on Friday. Work day at church on Saturday.

5) Backbiting and bickering.

6) No sense of "church family".

7) Hectic lives outside of church.

These are just some of the reasons off the top of my head.

 

[Sherrie]

thetaterkid...yep...sadly...I have seen that list before.

Sherrie

 

[Matthew 16:24]

I am not sure if someone has mentioned this already but I think it because there are too many false churches to choose from.
Satan has done a good job on tricking churches into twisting scripture.
People probably go and get confused and say "the heck with church, there are too many different churches". Just look in the phone book, there are too many to list. SBC, IFB, Free Will Baptist, Baptist, Baptist Bible fellowship, B conservative, B general, B general conference, B missionary, B GARBC, B National convention USA, and B reformed (B = Baptist).
That is just the listings under Baptist, not including all the other churches.
Anyway that is my take on it.

 

[wizofoz]

Originally posted by Tim:
IMHO there's too much emphasis on church buildings, meetings and activities--not enough emphasis on loving, life-changing relationships outside the building, not as official activities but just because we love God and each other.

Maybe if people saw that our Christianity really worked from Monday through Saturday, they'd be more interested in going on Sunday.

That's a challenge for all of us,

Tim

Tim,
You hit the nail on the head.

Who wants to go to a church in which the deacon tells you on Friday you need to be in church, and then you see the same deacon on Saturday night in a liquor store in the next city stocking up, his girlfriend waiting in the car?
I have heard that excuse so many times...."I'd go to that church, but so-and-so goes there, and I know what they do all week! A bunch of hypocrites!!"
Although it is a flimsy excuse, because I believe that you should not let others' actions hinder you from seeking God. You are not accountable for others' behaviors, nor are they accountable for yours.
There are no good "excuses". Excuses are attempts to justify doing what you should not be doing, or not doing what you should be doing.

 

[tyndale1946]

Hey what happened here all of the sudden this post expanded in size... Computerwise ... Who did it?... Brother Glen

&

Sister Charlotte

 

[Wygal]

by Istherenotacause: "Pray earnestly for those churches, and if I could, I would apologise for them, but there is no apology for that, so I would have to dis-associate with any church I knew held that attitude."
-----------------------------------------

Pray earnestly for - yes. Dis-associate with? It might be better to get a van full of disabled people, young and/or old, and head to one of the churches like this for a Wed. or Sun. evening service, or a revival service. If it opened up just one person's eyes, it might help them see where they're wrong - setting an example, instead of turning away from them.

 

[donnA]

Helen, Kelly,
Our church has a ramp out front of our building that was there before there were laws about it, and inside we have a small open elevator to take disables persons down stairs for a class or when we have fellowship meals.

 

[kandibear2801us]

I know at our church one of the reasons people aren't coming is we haven't had a regular pastor for several months.. I think one thing to remember in church as a member that when you see a new person to go over and talk to them and tell them sincerely that you are glad they came and try to get to know them. I think as church members sometimes we stay in clicks and sometimes that can be very lonely for outsiders. Making them feel welcome and letting them know about upcoming speakers or events helps them feel a little better. We have little badges that we put on our visitors I don't know if I like that idea but I guess it's ok! A lot of our members are in nursing homes and too ill to come I think we need a revival. Plus our bus system at church hasn't been very reliable and we don't outreach much out of our own neighborhood for that reason because if our bus breaks down we can't go get them!
I have a question to add to this though.. How come it is that a lot of parents will send their children but not bring them and stay themselves? I am a firm believer of NOT doing that! But I am glad for the kids at our church that get to come even if their parents are not coming!

 

[Mitsy]

I agree with Sherrie as to some of the reasons people no longer go to church. However, I will add a few of my own.

How about some ministers in some churches becoming romantically involved with a parishoner or church secretary? I recently visited with relatives who had experienced this in their own church and their son (who lives in another state) also had this same thing happen in the church he and his family attend. And this isn't just a "Baptist" issue here, I'm afraid it happens in just about every denomination out there.

I have posted about this before, but I also believe that sometimes the problem isn't so much leaving a particular church but leaving and NEVER trying to find a different one. I personally would not limit myself to just Baptist churches, but even if one did, there are many out there and sometimes people stay when they are stagnate and get nothing out of the church service whatsoever. It is better to get out of a church that isn't working rather than to stay and find more and more things wrong instead of just leaving.

I also think sometimes (I'm repeating myself here) that the minister is the main part of the problem. HE ends up becoming stagnate or becomes very lax in energizing the flock or being available when parishoners need to discuss things. I've seen many a pastor become self-absorbed with their own personal activities and give less and less to the congregation. The congregation usually ends up suffering because of this.

Right now I am having almost daily conversations with two friends from my former Evangelical-Free Church where I was a member for 15+ years. Both of these women are single (as I am) and clearly have outstayed their purpose at this particular church. There is basically NO ministry for singles there and it is a "family only" type of environment. The pastor has been there for 14 years which is way too long (in his case anyway). Several families have left and many who haven't stay out of obligation or maybe laziness in trying to find something different. I'm actually growing weary of hearing my two friends' woes when they are unwilling to even VISIT another church. Granted there may not be anything ideal for a lot of people, but staying in the same rut is NOT spiritually uplifting. I believe God gives you that nudge when it's time to do something different. I'm glad I didn't ignore that voice when it was time for me to find something else. My only regret was not leaving sooner.

 

[wizofoz]

The seats are too soft.

The seats are too hard.

All they want is your money.

They don't speak to me.

The preacher is too loud.

You can't hear the preacher.

I've read the Bible, why do I need someone to tell me what it says?

I'll go when I get my life straightened out.

I don't have any good clothes for church.

The preacher said some mean things about me last Sunday. I know he did! He was looking at me when he was preaching!

Ol' Deacon Glipsnort used to be a drunk. Why do they let drunks in their church?

Any of these sound familiar?

 

[KPBAP]

I think Jim1999 has the closest answer so far. We are a consumer society. We expect something for our time and money. People do not realize that church is NOT for receiving but for GIVING.. worship is active NOT passive. I know many people in church or parachurch organizations who do not attend on Sunday because they feel they have been in church all week. Many who DO attend go out of habit or a level of guilt that God will "get them" if they miss on Sunday, if they are truly honest. Sad, but true!

 

[Speedpass]

From someone who has spent TOO much time church-hopping the past four years, some personal observations on why I have a hard time staying in one church:

1)Everyone expects me to be bright-eyed, happy, and giddy every time we meet for worship.
2)Whenever I tell people about the struggles I have faced over the past few years I tend to be laughed at, ridiculed, judged, or ignored.
3)Ministers who expect people to come to the altar crying croccodile tears when the invitation is given , just to puff up their attitude.
4)Worship style(ie: saying the Lord's Prayer, Doxology, etc, every single Sunday; singing the same hymns, choruses, etc, every single Sunday; worship leaders who claim that their worship style is the ONLY true means of worshipping God).
5)The denominational struggles among Baptists. I sometimes feel that I need to either completely support the SBC, or completely support the CBF/mainstream/Baptists Committed/BGCT crowd in order to feel affirmed by a certain church.
6)People expecting me to serve in a ministry, and even though I indicate where I am willing to serve nobody follows through on it.
7)Finding a Sunday School class where i fit in best. I feel I am too old for the "college/career" scene, yet too young for some other Adult classes.

Jimmy

 

[Gib]

Why don't church members go to church? We don't offer them what they need. (Speaking of my church)
There is no enthusiasm in our teaching and doing the work of the church. Basically we open the doors, sit a while and close the doors.

Why don't non church members go to church? They feel the staleness. I had a co-worker come to my church who had just started going to church. We were the second church she visited. She said she did not want to hurt my feelings, but if she came to my church first that she would probably not went to any church. She said the people were cold and she felt like she was in a bad movie that was not going to end.

Of course it's not that bad. But compared to the other Baptist Church we were to her. The other Baptist church is a traditonal church, but has a refreshing attitude towards God and its fellowship with other believers.

 

[latterrain77]

Often, people don't return to church because they don't feel welcome. They feel like they are unwanted. Thanks! latterrain77

 

[legalsec2504]

We are not currently attending a church at this time. The main reason that my husband and I left our last church (a Southern Baptist church) was that the leadership and majority of the membership was too right wing. Way too conservative and there was too much preaching politics from the pulpit. My husband and I are democrats. We vote straight party. No deviations... When President Bush was elected, everyone in our Sunday School class verbally proclaimed how pleased they were that a Christian was now the President.

Huh... Who can say what was truly in President Clinton's heart. I think only God can say...

Anyway, that's no excuse for not attending church now. I have only myself and laziness to blame. My husband has told me he won't go back to a Southern Baptist church. I want to go back to Southern Baptist. I don't know how we will resolve that issue. That's my comments. Thanks for reading.

Jill

 

[Tim]

Quoting Jill "Huh... Who can say what was truly in President Clinton's heart."

Lust--if I were to venture a guess.

Nothing like being pitched a hanging curve ball,

Tim

 

[legalsec2504]

Uh Tim - have you sinned? Are you a Christian? Caught that ball and threw it right back.

Jill

 

[Tim]

I hope that my manner of life is not characterized by habitual sin. If it is, then no wonder if people don't want to go to my church (to bring it back to the subject at hand.

In Christ,

Tim

 

[Thankful]

legalsec2504

Hi from another Okie, We don't talk politics in our church and it is Southern Baptist.

 

[legalsec2504]

Thankful - I'm glad your church doesn't preach politics. My husband and I have lived in this town for 21 years and have visited at one time or another just about every Southern Baptist church.

Tim, you are right about not being a habitual sinner, but nobody knows the heart of George Bush, Dick Cheney. We have no way of knowing if they are habitual sinners. I just think that we should pray for our President - whatever party -. We don't know their inner hearts. That is for God to know.