Wives should submit to their husbands????

Genesis 3:16 (kjv)

16 Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.


Having said that...

My husband does love me very much, and submitting to him is so easy because he is so loving and caring. He wants my voice. He wants my opinion. He nurtures me. We have an excellent marriage. He doesnt make me call him Lord, wash his feet, or do anything arbitrary. Does he have a right to? In my opinion. No, but should he be foolish enough to think he did, I am obligated to obey.

I think he is a pretty smart man though, and he leads in a Godly manner.

 

Scarlett,
You make great points and have a great list. But I would say that flexibility is needed.
In my almost 30 years of marriage,we have changed how we do specific things on your list many times.
For example, who does what chores has depended on factors at the time that later might change.
We have belonged to more than one church, and classes varied.
However, talking about these issues upfront does give the couple insight into each other.

Karen

 

Scarlett

Even though things turned out the way they did, I still believe that your mother made the right decision to follow. Your father may have been in the wrong and they are now reaping the wrongness of that decision, but consider what would have happened if your father had gone to that church,and your mother stayed at the other. It could have been worse.

The church that we are at now, in no way did I want to attend when my husband decided that that would be where we were to stay. I wanted to buck away from it so bad, but I chose to submit. In my situation, this church has brought out the leader in my husband and he has grown leaps and bounds and is a better husband because of it. Meanwhile, I am still not in love with the church at all, and while I have in some way made myself at home there, I dont think that it is where we will end up long term...however, I dont think bibically, it was in my right to fight my husband on it, and I can see the fruit of my right choice. I can also still see where a different church might be a little more fitting for ministering to my needs.

My husband has never had to force my hand though. I willfully did this.

Just my opinion.

 

I agree. The only thing incorrect about the previous post is where she says "I am obligated to obey." She is not, as I'm sure you'll agree. GOdly sumbission does not mean "obedience to everything what the husband tells you to".

Not particluarly. In fact, all the Godly men I know share my views on the topic.

They're not. Period.

Never said they weren't, did I?

 

That's no longer true. If there's evidence of physical abuse, the police can make an arrest sans a victim pressing charges.

 

Not sure, to be honest with you.

 

I think you have it right, John.

 

Can anyone prove to me scripturally that I am not obligated to obey, because it seems pretty clear that I am to obey.

thanks

 

There is no scripture that tells a wife to do everything her husband tells her. There are verses covering submission, and being subject. These are contextually limited to the spiritual role. That's it.

I would, in fact, suggest that a wife who blindly does everything the husband says is abusing her own spiritual role of submission.

 

"These are contextually limited to the spiritual role. That's it."


How do you figure?


I dont blindly do every single thing that my husband tells me to do, but he is the leader in our family and I pray that God would give him wisdom in directing us in both spiritual and non spiritual matters.

One small example of a non-spiritual thing would be ironing. I used to like to iron 1 of his work outfits each night for it to be ready for him the next day. He did not like this arrangement at all. He wanted me to iron once weekly so that it would be done and he could spend more time with him in the evenings. This irritated me because I was the one doing the work, so I should be able to pick how it is done, but I could see how important it was to him for some silly reason, and I adapted to him and now I iron once a week instead of everynight, and I am glad that my husband pushed the issue, because I do like the fact that I dont have to do that annoying task each evening, just once a week.

I am his helper as the bible says. I was created to help him, as the bible also says. He loves me, as the bible commands him to do. We have an absolutely glorious, happy, strong, fulfilling marriage, and I feel it is because we both do our best to follow our roles. He leads with love, I follow with submission. "Wives, obey your husbands in everything." everything

 

What do you mean "how do I figure?" Read the full chapters that said verses are in, and it's apparant.

If he is the leader in your family over all things, it is because the two of you have decided that this is what works best for the two of you, which is perfectly fine. It is not a scriptural mandate.

There is no scriptural mandate requiring a wife to do all the ironing if the husband instructs her to.

The bible says you are his help-meet. That means that you are his aide, and he is yours to the same extent. The two of you are one flesh. There is no one above the other, or one apart from the other.

No, it says "Children, obey your parents in everything". It says of wives to "submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord." It also says you should "submit to one another out of reverence for Christ".

 

The whole thread comes down to the question of "Should wives submit to their husbands?"

The answer is "Yes", absolutely. They should submit as Scripture calls them to, not as their husbands tell them to.

 

Im sorry John, I just really dont agree with you on this.

I understand your view, but its just not what I personally get out of those scriptures. At any rate, I really have a glorious marriage.

 

I go by what scripture says. If you and your hubby have additionaly methods that work in your household, then that's perfectly fine. But don't presume that all Christian must do as you. They must do only as scripture instructs.

I'm sticking strictly to what scripture says. You can't argue with the fact that scripture does not say "Wives, obey your husbands in everything" as you stated. So to say "this is what scripture says" is patently wrong. If this is what you have chosen to do, that's fine. But to insist you are doing this "because scripture says" is a false application of scripture, not to mention a false application (and possibly abuse) of the scriptural roles of spouses.

So do I. I take my headship role very seriously. My wife takes her submission role very seriously. I don't "order" her or "command" thing of her, because if I did, I'd be abusing my spiritual role, and this committing sin. Likewise, she doesn't just "comply" with everything I want, becaust that would be an abuse of the spiritual role of submission. My wife is not below me, or above me. Neither am I to her. She is my equal, and together we are one body. Jesus Christ is the head of my household.

 

The head of the woman is the man. Why don't you tell us what this means, John? If it means equal, then we are equal with Christ in the same verse, and that is absolute heresy.