As I read the thread I couldn't help but think that what MaroonCat79 (among others) are actually protesting is not effective youth ministry, but ineffective youth activity.
Ministry seeks to meet spiritual and physical needs, where an individual or group is. Activity seeks to keep people occupied for predetermined period of time.
Ministry seeks to reveal Jesus, to invest deeply in the lives of others. Activity seeks to attract a crowd, to entertain.
These are two very distinct things. As a pastor I'm not interested in activity, I want ministry.
Because there is such a variety of needs, ages, abilities, etc... there is nothing wrong with seeking to minister to young people, old people, single people, children, married people, where they are at in life. This shouldn't be the only ministry effort just as an hour long expository sermon through Leviticus shouldn't be the only type of preaching.
There is great power in the collective and all group specific ministry should emphasize (insist on) the importance of coming together and sharing in our love of Jesus in worship as the one that scripture says we are. Opportunities should also be sought out that intentionally bring different groups together for purposes other than collective worship.
We need it all, group specific and collective - eliminating one or the other doesn't make a church better, just incomplete.