Bad Advice Only

Stay comfy on that car hauler, take a haulerday, and you will use much less than 1.987 gallons driving on and off the ramp.

My anniversary is next month and I have given her everything, what's left?

 

Basement: Get a shovel, dig a hole, and move the trailer over it.

Second floor: Have Home Depot put a shed on top. Less work for you.


My wife liked the idea of a fancy car but she does not drive. Now what?

 

Try the neighbor's windows.

I just bought 530 concrete blocks to build an outdoor fireplace/BBQ area but I've never laid block before.

 

You should go and bring your bugle and tambourine.

I'm starting to realize that I can't do somethings as easily as I used to, which includes bouncing when I hit the ground?.

 

Practice 'hitting the ground', the 'bounce' should return.

My dog has fleas.

 

Buy a big container of flea power and sprinkle it all over yourself twice a day so you don't get them.

It appears I did more work in the last year now that I'm not working than I did when I was working, however, a lot of this work was to decrease my normal maintenance work to help prepare for when I stop working all the time. How will my plan ever work?

 

Of course, your plan will never work, you haven't worked enough on working it out, go work harder on working it out so maybe the plan has a chance to work.

A Bald Eagle is methodically whittling away at our flock of free-range chickens. We can't kill it, nor do we ever see it to kill it if we were allowed to kill it.

 

Plan A: You’re going to have to hire a bored teenager with a shotgun to hide out and stalk that chicken predator with the instructions that he gets paid a bounty as soon as he Triple-S that birdy. (3 x S = Shoot, Shovel, Shut up)

Plan B: You need to seek out and purchase a dozen of the meanest attack roosters you can find and add them to your flock so no living thing that could possibly consider a threat can get within 50 feet of your chickens or even enter your property.


What could kyredneck name his 12 Rooster defense force should he choose Plan B?

 

...especially the shut up part.

I've raised 4 teenagers, they're all bored, don't trust em'.

Game roosters easy to come by here but then egg production goes ka-put; not a solution. Have livestock guardian dogs that have defeated all other predators so far, but this [very] high-flying eagle's tactics have succeeded, even with these hawk-wary chickens. But, I think
they may be becoming eagle-wary now, we'll see.

If the eagle meets with a violent end, you'll never know about it.

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How to deal with all these ranting TDS crazies that have openly shown that they've lost their minds?

 

Start by dying your hair blue and be sure you avoid any perception of micro-aggressions while passing out TDS therapy information and free rainbow MAGA hats.

5 owls that were enjoying raiding my coop at night and ripping the heads off my white racing homer pigeons for sport mysteriously disappeared about 8 months ago and now my pigeons are breeding like rabbits and the flock has suddenly grown to over 100 birds. I did a white dove released of 40 birds 50 miles away thinking some would get lost but they all beat my home. Now what do I do?