Recently, I made a post detailing some of the struggles I have been going through recently. As some of you know, I am going through an amicable divorce that was requested by my wife.
Regulus, I have not read any other post but the OP in this thread... my deepest prayers for you and your tribulation you are currently having. Divorce is very painful for any and all.
I felt lost and did not know how I could ever feel right with God knowing that I broke my vows
It is unclear to me what "broke my vows" entails. But I can relate to that horrible bottom one finds themselves at in times like divorce.
Sins that are so egregious that, even though I profess Christ as my savior, I cannot possibly have ever been regenerated by God and predestined to salvation.
We are all sinners and degenerates. God only saves those that are such (for all are such).
I recently attempted to reach out to two well-known Calvinist theologians for spiritual advice, and it seems that they wanted to dismiss my cries for help and have my local church deal with it. That hurt me. I felt the need to reexamine why I'm experiencing such hopelessness.
I'm sorry you didn't get what you felt you needed. My advice would be, the body of Christ is not just one church (one building). Those at the one you went might not be equipped for what you need. Also, sometimes one must leave to then 'come home again'. By leave I mean seek another support church (Calvinist or not).
Could it be that God really is not willing for any to perish, but for all to come to repentance?
Most certainly it is the case. BTW, not all Calvinists are Limited Atonement advocates. Traditionally, meaning all the way back to even John Calvin's times, there were 4 point Calvinists (and they accepted and affirmed such under the articles and counsels).
Could it be that God wants all people to be saved and come to know the truth?
At least Scripture says He does.
If He does, then I have comfort knowing that forgiveness is available for me. If not, then I have no reason to believe that I'm one of the elect and might as well give up my faith entirely.
I'm not sure your reasoning here based on your current condition. Let the man here that has not sinned since He became saved step forward now and pass final judgement on you.
Repent and humble yourself before the Lord that forgives and is merciful. As King David, who was the Adulterer and Murderer said after being a man of God, for God, ... "I have sinned against the LORD." (2Sam 12:13). But it was said, because David repented and humbled himself before he Lord, "The LORD also has put away your sin" (2Sam 12:13).
Humble yourself before God, seek His grace, take His chastisement if there is any due, and have hope.
Peace and hope to you brother