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Biblical Solution to Spousal Abuse
- Thread starter Eladar
- Start date
Eadar, that would be did. 
On the other remark about putting the person in jail....... I think its a good thing. One it gives the abused person a break (if however so brief). Gives the abuser time to cool it and possibley and hopefully an opening for someone (clergy or counselor) to try and get through to the abuser. I'm not saying it would help but it sure don't help keeping the abuser in the home with the battered spouse.
On the other remark about putting the person in jail....... I think its a good thing. One it gives the abused person a break (if however so brief). Gives the abuser time to cool it and possibley and hopefully an opening for someone (clergy or counselor) to try and get through to the abuser. I'm not saying it would help but it sure don't help keeping the abuser in the home with the battered spouse.
I had a reply to this, but decided that a different approach is better at this point.
I am not trying to attack the "throw the jerk in jail" crowd. I am simply trying to find a Biblical answer to the problem.
This is for everyone:
If you don't have a Biblical answer to this problem and simply want to label me an "abuser lover" and tell me how wrong I am for my position, please do not bother. Such discussions are going no where and are taking this thread away from what I intended it to be.
Is there an actual Biblical answer to what abused spouses are supposed to do?
It seems to me that the answer so far is that either the spouse can stay in hopes that the abuser will turn to God or the spouse can leave but not divorce the abuser.
Then please rescue us from our ignorance. What, pray tell, is the right answer?
We as Christians are resposible to the laws of our respective nations, be it the U.S, Australia or the U.K or wherever, if you beat your wife up you rightfully are going to jail. As Christians it is our responsability to submit to that law. God appoints the leadership of our nations, and those laws are put there for good reason.
Ed Silvoso has a huge ministry in Argentina yet they have found that alot happens there with Spousal abuse, so what his church does is actually take the wife away from the husband and place her in protective custody and usually the children as well. The husband will not ever see that wife again until he can genuinley prove that he has reformed from it. I think that too is fair enough.
A wife is the greatest ever blessing that God can give a man, if you abuse your wife she does not have to put up with it, and rightly can leave.
Ed Silvoso has a huge ministry in Argentina yet they have found that alot happens there with Spousal abuse, so what his church does is actually take the wife away from the husband and place her in protective custody and usually the children as well. The husband will not ever see that wife again until he can genuinley prove that he has reformed from it. I think that too is fair enough.
A wife is the greatest ever blessing that God can give a man, if you abuse your wife she does not have to put up with it, and rightly can leave.
God can turn the blackest sin-sick heart. He turned mine. Statistically, if she stays until that happens she may be dead or seriously injured.
Can I qualify that? With a plan. The goal is always healing, restoration and reconciliation. Until the abuser can demonstrate "the change wrought in me" consistantly the abused should have the benefit of safety.
In most states law enforcement has no choice but to arrest an abuser. Health professionals and clergy are required to report suspected and actual cases of abuse. Is that Biblical? We do, as Ben said, have a responsibility to the laws of our government. I pastor and also serve with a city police department. If you have beat your spouse or child and come to me there are two things you can count on: I will pray with you and you are going to jail.
HUH? You just lost me. Based on the verses I qioted my thoughts are to stone the abuser. But alas, stoning is no longer used in this day and age, so off to jail he goes. I personally see nothing wrong in the wifew leaving, if the hubby doesn't change, off to divorce attorney for her.
Oh, I'm sure this will take heat from some of you die hard no divorce no matter what types, but well...it's how I feel. No blown gaskets, no anger, just sadness.
Perhaps the clearest passage can be found here.
Romans 13:1-7
1 Every person is to be in subjection to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those which exist are established by God.
2 Therefore whoever resists authority has opposed the ordinance of God; and they who have opposed will receive condemnation upon themselves.
3 For rulers are not a cause of fear for good behavior, but for evil. Do you want to have no fear of authority? Do what is good and you will have praise from the same;
4 for it is a minister of God to you for good. But if you do what is evil, be afraid; for it does not bear the sword for nothing; for it is a minister of God, an avenger who brings wrath on the one who practices evil.
5 Therefore it is necessary to be in subjection, not only because of wrath, but also for conscience’ sake.
6 For because of this you also pay taxes, for rulers are servants of God, devoting themselves to this very thing.
7 Render to all what is due them: tax to whom tax is due; custom to whom custom; fear to whom fear; honor to whom honor.
Every person is under subjection both abuser and the abused. Abuse is a crime and we are under obligation to report crime to the authorities. Some positions ie: pastor, school teachers, healthcare, etc. carry a heavier responsibility. If the abused will not or cannot report the crime then someone with direct knowledge of the crime is obligated to report it. Justice is a minister of God for good and evil. It is dealt in different ways as the text indicates.
If you are dealing with a case of spouse abuse you will hear, "but I love him." more often than "arrest that man." Consider the vows taken at marriage, typically to love, honor and cherish for better/worse, richer/poorer in sickness/health. How is love demonstrated with a fist or weapon? How can someone be honored and abused at the same time? You cannot cherish and choke at the same time. The abuser has already demonstrated the vows spoken before God and witnessed by man meant nothing. There would be a stronger argument that the abuser has sent her away (even if not physically) than to believe she retains an obligation to stay.
Your profile says you teach HS math. What are you required to do at school? If you fear a conflict between your obligations to the school district and to your Lord, rest easy Brother. There isn't one.
If you are dealing with an actual situation and not theory, email me with all haste.
Yes, I make a distinction.
Most times there must be a divorce because the abuser will not "leave the abused alone". Divorce him and disappear. Have no more to do with him. Too many statistics about the abused getting the gumption up to finally boot the abuser out and the abused becomes a homicide.
If there are children involved, whether being abused, or seeing Mom getting abused, well...that kind of pain never goes away and in itself is a form of abuse. They need to get out and away the sooner the better, if "getting away" means divorce then I have no problem with it.
Most times there must be a divorce because the abuser will not "leave the abused alone". Divorce him and disappear. Have no more to do with him. Too many statistics about the abused getting the gumption up to finally boot the abuser out and the abused becomes a homicide.
If there are children involved, whether being abused, or seeing Mom getting abused, well...that kind of pain never goes away and in itself is a form of abuse. They need to get out and away the sooner the better, if "getting away" means divorce then I have no problem with it.
I won't respond to the rest because it just goes back into the same circle again, pulling the thread off topic again.
And no, this is not something I'm dealing with right now. It is purely hypothetical.
If it were about my teaching position, I'd ask the question in regards to a teaching position.
And no, this is not something I'm dealing with right now. It is purely hypothetical.
If it were about my teaching position, I'd ask the question in regards to a teaching position.