Contraception

[Paul33]

And I also know a family where they have only two kids and the parents work all the time, are selfish and self-centered, and are only interested in their own pleasure and success.

The kids are raising themselves.

I also know a family that has eight children, the mother stayed home, the children are respectful and courteous, work hard and are responsible. The husband provides well for his family, but money isn't the goal of his life.

The truth is, most people limit the size of their family because they have other interests than raising children.

For those who claim to be responsible in using birth control and laugh at those who don't, is God so small that he can't plan your reproductive life and bless you with just the children he wants you to have?

We who live in the wealthiest country in the world limit the size of our families on the basis that we can't afford more than two? Right.

 

[TaterTot]

well, it doesnt take a rocket scientist to figure out how not to get pregnant, with or without contraception. Just because we "desire" to do a certain activity does not mean that it is necessarily God prompting that in us, so that we can conceive. I mean, sometimes, I really want a pice of chocolate. And its not because my body needs the nourishment.

 

[Karen]

Dear forever faithful,
I'm surprised no one else has mentioned this, but it kind of sounds like you are thinking it is your decision alone, and you are waiting for God to give you a conclusive feeling. But what about your husband?

But God has already given you circumstances and the advice of Christians you respect. It sounds like your husband is deeply concerned about your health and the family finances.
You have only been married 3 weeks. And you say it is taking a toll on your marriage.

Don't just rely on your feelings. They come and go.
If I were in your situation, I would be using birth control. But you and your husband will have to come to a decision together.
What I am concerned about is that it doesn't sound like you and your husband are in agreement or are communicating well on this issue.

Karen

 

[Liz Ward]

The pill can act as an abortifacient, that is the major problem with it. It isn't it's primary method, though if you're talking about the mini-pill you'd probably be horrified at how often it works by preventing implantation, but it is a back-up method. If you believe life begins at conception and you do not believe in abortion, then the pill is out for you, it's as simple as that. Do check with the manufacturer's literature and with your doctor, but that is the admission made by all the manufacturers i have heard of.

Liz

 

[Aaron]

Originally posted by forever faithful:
It is taking a toll on my 3 week old marriage. I am frustrating my husband by going back and forth. He too is worried about my health and our financial situation.

God doesn't send mouths without sending meat. Forget about the world's ideas about what good parenting is. Let me tell you what it isn't—it isn't about money or college.

You will not have all the things that you want, or all that the world thinks you should provide to be good parents, e.g., college education.

A Good name is rather to be chosen than great riches, and loving favour rather than silver and gold. Proverbs 22:1.

God is your Father. If you asked your earthly father for bread, would he give you a rock? If you asked him for fish, would he give you a snake? If your earthly father knows how to give good gifts to you, how much more will your heavenly Father give good things to you if you ask Him? He owns the cattle on a thousand hills.

We have not because we ask not.

If God gives you one or eight children, and you ask Him, He will provide the means by which to raise them.

When my first daughter was born I was working part time making $6.39 and hour, and my wife did not work. We had one car (still have one car) no phone, no insurance, and if at the end of the week we had 23 cents in the bank we thought we were doing great!

When my second daughter arrived, I was doing a little better. I was working 60-70 hours a week digging ditches for $7.00 and hour and no overtime pay. We had a phone and a little window unit.

When my third arrived, I was working two full-time jobs.

After 11 years of marriage we bought our first house. A hundred-year-old house in the low rent district needing lots of work. We've been there three years. My oldest girl is the only one with her own room. She's 13 and just got her first complete matching bedroom set. I got four pieces at an auction for $110.

Anyway, the point is, quit looking around and comparing yourself to other people. Focus on what pleases God, and have faith.

 

[Victory in Jesus]

"For those who feel that birth control is wrong - I have to ask you - do you think God is so small and unpowerful that He cannot cause you to conceive a child He desires to live despite your use of birthcontrol?"

TexasSky, I was thinking the same thing when I was reading these posts.

My parents tried not to have me. Back back in August 1962, I suppose (july, actually?) my parents were already adjusting to one baby that was 3 months old and my mother didn't want to have another child any time soon. The birth control pill was just coming out and she went to the doctor to get a RX, but the doctor told her it hadn't been on the market long enough for him to justify writing one (didn't know the side-effects, effectiveness, etc). He told her to go with the rhythm method, and explained it to her using a calendar.

I won't leave you in suspense...I happened, anyway. She cried when she found out she was pregnant with me. Abortion wasn't an option back then. Although I have felt special enough that God wanted me on this earth in spite of their efforts, I have felt the least loved of their five kids. Before I knew about this, I wondered many times what I did wrong. I don't want to go into specifics, but I do want to make this point that some people seem to miss:

If a couple does NOT want to have more children, for HEAVEN'S SAKE...DON"T TRY TO GUILT THEM INTO HAVING MORE!!! There will be a great possibility that they will be unloved and uncared for, anyway. They may be emotionally abandoned, and may suffer many emotional issues that they may not be able to seek professional help for because many Christians like to preach against psychiatrists, too.

I've seen it mentioned that it's ok to control the number of children if there are health problems, but we must rely on God if the issue is money. God can't heal? Why can God provide money, but He can't heal? Perhaps it's because money comes and goes but a woman has only one life to spare and if it's lost during childbirth, the child grows up without a mother? Wouldn't that be REALLY stepping out of faith, then?

I'm not advocating that sick mothers should be fruitful and multiply regardless. I'm just giving you something to ponder.

OK, now the flip side: I used a berrier method to prevent a child because we were dirt poor. The Lord seemed to have said, "Let me worry about the money...Here's your beautiful baby girl!". We love her to death. The Lord has supplied all our needs and if she was never born, our son would be an only child because we never would have seemed to be wealthy enough to have a second child.

I wanted my girl to know what happened when she was old enough to understand...when I gave her "the talk". I wanted her to know that it was like a house...how we would have loved to have a very nice house, but it was too expensive to pay for, we thought. But, the Lord gave us a beautiful baby girl and because she was born, we've learned to trust in Him more. We never regretted having her...but we tried to avoid the situation. I wanted her to feel special like I felt...that even though we tried not to have an expense, that the Lord saw her to be so special that He wanted her on Earth for a reason.

I didn't want her to go through what I went through. I wanted her to know we never rejected her...we were happy when we found out I was pregnant...scared, but happy. The doctors/nurses tried to talk me into an abortion, but I never entertained the thought...not for a second.

It's not our job to decide whether someone else should have more children. Are we going to help them financially if they throw away the contraceptives and later find themselves in the poorhouse? Are we going to babysit them when the mother knew all along she couldn't emotionally handle more kids?

It's not our responsibility to raise someone else's kids, and it's not our responsibility to decide for them whether or not they should have more kids.

If they want more kids, let the Lord decide if they're a burden to society. God will provide. Children would be blessed to be born into a home with parents who love them and depend on the Lord to supply their needs.

 

[GodsAmbassador]

Well, I was just reading through here, and decided to jump in here. I am 17 and come from a family of 5 kids, all born in 7 years. My parents have never been "rich", in fact there have been times my Dad was out of work, but my parents have strong faith, and we never went hungry. There have been times when all we had to eat in the house was a bowl of soup, but just in time God provided us with what we needed. It's a rare treat to get to go to a restaurant, but us kids never complained. No, we didn't always have money for expensive toys and play things, but we learned how to make do. We did have a swingset someone gave us, we used sticks for guns, and had 180 acres to play in. I know not every kid has that great opportunity, but we enjoyed it. With trees to climb and vines to swing on, we were happy, and didn't need computers, xbox, playstation, etc. that so many kids today have. My point is, even though we were considered a somwhat large family, and were also considered poor, we were happy. I personally don't believe in birth control, and plan on having as many kids as God wants me to have. I believe He is the one who opens and closes the womb and He will decide if I have 2 kids or 20. Yes, kids are a lot of work, but they are also God's reward.

Just my 2 cents for whatever it's worth.

 

[Paul33]

GA,

I'm with you. I want to give you one caution. If you are going to trust the LORD for how many children you have, trust the LORD for how you feed your children as well.

No bottles, no water, no formula, no nothing but momma. That also means no pacifiers. If you breastfeed on demand, on average, ovulation is suppressed for 15 months. As soon as I write this, there will be others who will say that it didn't work for them. That's why it's called "on average."

My wife and I did do this, and my children are spread out naturally, every two years.

If the child sleeps with you in bed, the baby can nurse all night long. Again, I know from our experience that this suppressed ovulation for 15 months, on average!

 

[GodsAmbassador]

I agree with you there. For a time, I was planning on studying to be a midwife, so I read all the articles on breastfeeding, pacifiers, etc. My mom also told me the same kind of things. And you are SO right about trusting God for how to feed your children. I believe that's how we survived, when all we had was just enough soup to go around, not knowing where the next dollar was coming from, etc., then God performed a miracle and we never went without a meal.

 

[TaterTot]

I am one of those mom's it didnt work for But it still was God's timing, and his provision has been incredible.
But I do believe that its ok to decide whether or not you want to conceive at a certain time.

 

[4His_glory]

This whole thread is crazy. The fact is that the Bible says NOTHING about birth control. Zip, zero, nilch, nada!

Yes it does talk about children beeing a blessing, but it does not say if contraception is right or wrong.

One must also remember that there is a differnece between faith and foolishness.

Yes some folks may have come from large families and or heard of large families that were poor but things turned out all right. You never hear the stories where things didn't though.

Why can't people let this be an issue of soul liberty between them and God.

I agree with Tater on this one. My wife is expecting our thrid, and no we did not want him/her at the time, but God allowed this to happen despite our efforts.

 

[menageriekeeper]

Well, I won't say the Bible never said anything about birth control. It did touch on the issue at least once.

Judah had 3 sons. The eldest married a woman named Tamar, then died because of his wickedness. The second one married Tamar and refused to father a child with her, because that child would have recieve the eldest brother's inheritance. The second brother died for this sin. The story is found in Genesis 38.

I do believe though that the sin here was selfishness rather than birth control.

 

[4His_glory]

Correct, birth control was not the issue of this passage. Judah's son was killed not because of birth control, but because he disregarded his duty and disobeyed God. Yes, it was about selfishness.

What I meant was that the Bible is silent regarding birth control wether it be right or wrong.

 

[Aaron]

Originally posted by 4His_glory:
This whole thread is crazy. The fact is that the Bible says NOTHING about birth control. Zip, zero, nilch, nada!

Yes it does talk about children beeing a blessing, but it does not say if contraception is right or wrong.

Why don't we call it "blessing control" instead?

I mean, 2.5 blessings is enough for any family, right? Unless the blessing is money, that is.

 

[Aaron]

Originally posted by 4His_glory:
This whole thread is crazy. The fact is that the Bible says NOTHING about birth control. Zip, zero, nilch, nada!

Aren't you presuming an awful lot—I mean other than a complete and total knowledge of the Bible? (After all, to say that God's mind concerning reproduction is not revealed in the Scriptures is to say that you know all that He did say. Wouldn't you agree? Of course you do, otherwise your statement is unreliable.)

But, I'm willing to grant that you have an exhaustive knowledge of the Scriptures—every doctrine, every implication; there is nothing, NOTHING, that can be gleaned from the Scriptures that you do not already know. That being said, aren't you still presuming an awful lot? If God has not revealed His will concerning contraception, how is it anything but wreckless endangerment to presume He's O.K. with it?

 

[Aaron]

Originally posted by 4His_glory:
Correct, birth control was not the issue of this passage. Judah's son was killed not because of birth control, but because he disregarded his duty and disobeyed God. Yes, it was about selfishness.

Got to thinking...what is birth control about if it's not about self?

 

[Aaron]

Originally posted by Aaron:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by 4His_glory:
This whole thread is crazy. The fact is that the Bible says NOTHING about birth control. Zip, zero, nilch, nada!

Yes it does talk about children beeing a blessing, but it does not say if contraception is right or wrong.

Why don't we call it "blessing control" instead?

I mean, 2.5 blessings is enough for any family, right? Unless the blessing is money, that is.

</font>[/QUOTE]How about "blessing prevention" ? It just kind of trips along softly on the tongue better than "blessing control". Wouldn't you agree?

 

[Jeffrey H]

I'll be frank about birth control. My wife and I practice it because we don't really desire anymore than what we have. I'm 43 and my wife is 38. We have 3 kids: 7, 4, and 2. They are a blessing from the Lord and we could not imagine life without them. However, we are not "trying" to have anymore; we are preventing. If God in His infinite mercy and wisdom desires for us to have more children then we will have more children. He knows what is best, will provide for our needs, and bless us even more.

 

[4His_glory]

Originally posted by Aaron:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by 4His_glory:
This whole thread is crazy. The fact is that the Bible says NOTHING about birth control. Zip, zero, nilch, nada!

Yes it does talk about children beeing a blessing, but it does not say if contraception is right or wrong.

Why don't we call it "blessing control" instead?

I mean, 2.5 blessings is enough for any family, right? Unless the blessing is money, that is.

</font>[/QUOTE]If a couple decides that 2.5 blessings is what God wants for them then that is fine.

Don't you think God is sovereign enough to overule birth control, because He does, I know that personally.

It is none of your business what others believe is best for their lives.

 

[4His_glory]

Originally posted by Aaron:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by 4His_glory:
This whole thread is crazy. The fact is that the Bible says NOTHING about birth control. Zip, zero, nilch, nada!

Aren't you presuming an awful lot—I mean other than a complete and total knowledge of the Bible? (After all, to say that God's mind concerning reproduction is not revealed in the Scriptures is to say that you know all that He did say. Wouldn't you agree? Of course you do, otherwise your statement is unreliable.)

But, I'm willing to grant that you have an exhaustive knowledge of the Scriptures—every doctrine, every implication; there is nothing, NOTHING, that can be gleaned from the Scriptures that you do not already know. That being said, aren't you still presuming an awful lot? If God has not revealed His will concerning contraception, how is it anything but wreckless endangerment to presume He's O.K. with it? </font>[/QUOTE]No not at all. The fact is I do know just about every doctrine, that doesn't mean I understand every aspect of them.

You can not equate birth control to a doctrine, unless it falls under the realm of practical theology. But I have read my Bible through enough times to know that is does not directly address the issue.

If God wanted to reveal to me differntly He would from His Word, but He hasn't. There is no reckless endagerment. Lets flip your question. "IF God has not revealed anything concerning birth control, is it not foolish to say that He is against it, and tell others they are wrong for doing so?"

Prove to me from the Scriptures that contraception is wrong.