For you to prove annihilationism from apollumi, you must prove that it without doubt refers to the death of the soul in the NT.
You misread the lexical entry. Friberg was saying that appolumi means to kill physically, as it clearly does in Matt. 2:13. Over and over again it has the plain meaning of killing or dying physically. In Matthew alone we have that meaning in 8:25, 10:39, 12:14, 16:25, 21:41, 22:7, 26:52. So I would say the core meaning of the word is to kill or be killed.
You see something which those who do not do word studies in Greek are likely to miss. Namely, when used in the context of what one person does to another person,
apollumi very consistently means “to kill”. And when used passively to refer to what happens to a person, it very consistently means “to die, to perish”. There does seem to be an additional nuance of meaning in that the death described by
apollumi seems to be often a violent one.
Now, when someone is physically killed on earth, the part of them which is dead is the body. And their body can no longer feel or think anything. We know that whatever God does to the unrighteous at the judgment, it will be done to both their body and soul.
Apollumi is used a number of times to refer to the final fate of the unrighteous. Here are two examples in addition to John 3:16 and Matthew 10:28, which we are already discussing:
1. Luke 13:2-5
ESV
Luke 13:2 And he answered them, "Do you think that these Galileans were worse sinners than all the other Galileans, because they suffered in this way? 3 No, I tell you; but unless you repent, you will all likewise
perish. 4 Or those eighteen on whom the tower in Siloam fell and killed them: do you think that they were worse offenders than all the others who lived in Jerusalem? 5 No, I tell you; but unless you repent, you will all likewise
perish."
BGT
Luke 13:2 καὶ ἀποκριθεὶς εἶπεν αὐτοῖς· δοκεῖτε ὅτι οἱ Γαλιλαῖοι οὗτοι ἁμαρτωλοὶ παρὰ πάντας τοὺς Γαλιλαίους ἐγένοντο, ὅτι ταῦτα πεπόνθασιν; 3 οὐχί, λέγω ὑμῖν, ἀλλ᾽ ἐὰν μὴ μετανοῆτε πάντες ὁμοίως
ἀπολεῖσθε. 4 ἢ ἐκεῖνοι οἱ δεκαοκτὼ ἐφ᾽ οὓς ἔπεσεν ὁ πύργος ἐν τῷ Σιλωὰμ καὶ ἀπέκτεινεν αὐτούς, δοκεῖτε ὅτι αὐτοὶ ὀφειλέται ἐγένοντο παρὰ πάντας τοὺς ἀνθρώπους τοὺς κατοικοῦντας Ἰερουσαλήμ; 5 οὐχί, λέγω ὑμῖν, ἀλλ᾽ ἐὰν μὴ μετανοῆτε πάντες ὡσαύτως
ἀπολεῖσθε.
In this passage, Jesus warns that if people do not repent, they will perish (
apollumi). This cannot simply mean that they will physically die in this age, for repenting does not keep us from physically dying in this age. Notice that the fate of the unrepentant is compared to the fate of people who were slaughtered by Pilate or who had a tower fall on them. All this fits the basic meaning of
apollumi, which is to be killed, albeit by a violent death which may include temporary suffering.
Why would Jesus describe the results of not repenting in this way, if in fact the results of not repenting were to be kept alive in a state of torment eternally? Again, not repenting has no effect one way on the other that we all die physically in this age.
2. Hebrews 10:39
ESV
Hebrews 10:39 But we are not of those who shrink back and are
destroyed, but of those who have faith and preserve their
souls.
BGT
Hebrews 10:39 ἡμεῖς δὲ οὐκ ἐσμὲν ὑποστολῆς εἰς
ἀπώλειαν ἀλλὰ πίστεως εἰς περιποίησιν
ψυχῆς.
In this verse, the alternative to preserving one’s soul is to be destroyed (
apollumi).
You have asked for evidence that
apollumi refers to causing a soul to perish. Since it clearly refers to causing bodies to perish when used of bodies, why should we expect it to mean something different when applied to souls?
And what is the alternative? Where is there evidence that
apollumi can mean “to torment”, or passively, “to be tormented”. I’ve looked at all the uses of
apollumi in the NT, and many examples outside it, and I cannot think of one place where the context indicates “to torment” is the meaning. Are you aware of any such examples? So why choose a meaning (to torment) for
apollumi which has no examples to support it, over a meaning which has many examples (to kill, to cause to perish)?
In terms of meanings such as “to lose” or “to ruin”, these meanings are not found when
apollumi refers to what one personal agent intentionally does to another person. Can you find any examples like that? I honestly cannot, and I’ve looked at this topic repeatedly.
There is yet a lot of evidence, but this is enough I think for one comment. Let’s keep talking!
Have you read the Counterpoints 4 views book?
Yes, in fact I've read both the both the first edition from 1996, and the second edition (with new contributors for the views) in 2016. Thanks for pointing out this resource.