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How to get the fellowship I need?
- Thread starter evangelist6589
- Start date
Sounds like a good plan to me
I do hiking and sight seeing. However I do not ski. Hunting and fishing? Did these as a kid and my wife has no interest in these so yes thats a great idea to find other men in other churches with this interest. I also had in mind to go to a ballgame but my wife does not have this interest, but the Zoo and an amusement park she may go. But certainly there has to be men in other churches with these interests as I am not aware of anyone in my church with these interests.
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Might suggest that "activities" with other men should not be the aim of a believer. I think you need to approach it as a brother needing to know his brothers. One body with many members.
You need your brothers (and visa versa) for much more than an activity once in a while.
It might start with an activity, but you should have a goal that reaches far beyond "buddies" who go to a ballgame, fishing, etc. together every now and then.
Then again, it might start with several who simply have the common bond of being brothers in Christ, who don't necessarily have a lot of entertainment interests in common
salzer mtn
Well-Known Member
If I go to a church and the CHRIST is preached, I have fellowship with God. The Spirit of God holds fellowship with me when I commit my day's to him in reading his word, praying to the Father, and singing his praises. The church I go to don't have special activities for individual groups of people other than fellowship dinner every so often. The congregation young and old come for one reason and that is to hear the gospel. Everyone believes alike and worships God together and this is true fellowship. If a person has fellowship with God through Christ there is no need in seeking fellowship among mortals for satisfaction.
SaggyWoman
Active Member
You should do things with your wife to fellowship in small group, but you should also maybe join a men's only small group.
Maybe you could also start something new at your church for the other men who are also craving this. And others who don't know it yet.
Maybe you could also start something new at your church for the other men who are also craving this. And others who don't know it yet.
"A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother" (Prov. 18:24).
NaasPreacher (C4K)
Well-Known Member
That's what my pastor told me thirty years ago when I asked him why people were so unfriendly to new visitors (which we were at the time).
Changed my life.
Or join a softball league & to heck with the church. Personally I dont get anything from church.....not fellowship, not spirituality, not great commission so they are right, you need to grab the bull by the horns & do what is important. And perhaps your church in the final analysis is not your weekly gathering place. Perhaps its the both of you around a kitchen table praying & studying. and as you go through your neighborhood, you will meet with many (believe me many) who will tell you why conventional churches just never did it for them. Invite them to a bible study & maybe go out & get a pizza with them. Grow your friendships & continue inviting them to study sessions. Maybe just maybe you will find your planting something.
Actually in my experience ACTIVITIES are what drives brothers closer. At my last church we had lots of activities and at times it drew us all closer. Unfortunately the turnover rate with males in the singles ministry was high but females often stuck there and they ended up being my closer friends, however this was not intended. However at BJU I had some close male friends and you know what drive us closer? Activities, companionship, doing things together, having dinner together and so forth. It was 10 times easier in that environment since I was living on campus and it was easier to make friends. BJU at that time required all non married graduate students to live on campus. I was single then and I would have been MISERABLE if I had lived all alone by myself off campus. In fact it was difficult for me to make friends at first since I was one of the rare and few students that went to graduate school there that came from another university. MOST came from BJU and went to grad school from BJU.
But in my present case I should pray more for couples friends, and such. We do have a couple that invited us to dinner and they are attending an evangelical church. They used to attend the IFB church until they saw enough of the legalism and rigidness of the IFB movement and moved on elsewhere.
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This is only half true. People also bond based on common interests, common personalities, and such. The Law of the Group states that people act as such. I know in the church it should be different, but face the facts, the church has become just like the world.
Softball? Thats an excellent idea. Thats a way to make common bonds.
They are IFB and they control everything so starting something is out of the question. However I should send the pastor an email. However what he will say is mention the rare activities they do have, and yes there are some male activities there are just not much of them. Maybe 1-2 times a year not including prayer breakfasts once every 4-6 months.
I think I need to get my fellowship in other more active and larger churches.
No, it is 100% true. It is also true that people become friends based on common interests. But if you are someone who follows Jesus with all of your heart, others who love Jesus will be drawn to you. Two of my friends from college 40 years ago are Japanese pastors with which I have little in common other than the ministry.
But your wife should be your best friend. There have been many times on the mission field when we were hours away from friends. Those times drew my wife and me close together, so that I'd truly rather be doing things with her than anyone in the world.
Now, if you make your wife your best friend, you will not say such vicious things about her in front of everyone on the Internet as you said in this post early in the thread:
I would never, ever say such things about my wife, even in my heart, much less to other people. You are to love your wife as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for it. Christ would never insult the church.
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salzer mtn
Well-Known Member
:thumbsup:
Exactly!!! (And thus why I posted some Eph 5 verses a couple of pages ago, which were ignored)
For a Christian husband to ignore Eph. 5 is inexcusable. He should read it and meditate on it over and over, and do his best to obey it.
I remember hearing of a young seminary student who said to his prof, "I think I love my wife too much." The prof replied, "Do you love her more than Christ loved the church?" The student said, "No, of course not." The prof answered, "Then you don't love her too much."
To evangelist6589: I have started a thread on "Make Your Mate Your Best Friend." I hope you'll take it to heart. :type:
This may be true it just depends on whom I am around and if they also love Jesus. On FB I have seen this true giving the amount of new people wanting to be my friend and probably based on my love for the word, for books, and for evangelism. At Church I do show a desire for the word, for evangelism, and for theology as our SS is discussion based, but it does not mean people have befriended me. At my old church in the singles ministry people just did not have an interest in theology, the word, or evangelism and so my comments made no sense to them. However I have been at other churches where this was not the case and people loved it.
Sorry about my comments, I was just stating the facts, but probably should not have done so publicly about my wife.
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