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Is it okay to "Whip" a Child?

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moondg

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I wish everyone was as concerned about abortion as they are someone whipping there children if abortion is legal at 9 months why not 21 years old or 40? The press picks there fights. They what they can get the most run out of. I do not think children should be abused but what is the definition of abuse? who decides what punishment is proper the government? They are doing a fine job at everything else!
 

Revmitchell

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I wish everyone was as concerned about abortion as they are someone whipping there children if abortion is legal at 9 months why not 21 years old or 40? The press picks there fights. They what they can get the most run out of. I do not think children should be abused but what is the definition of abuse? who decides what punishment is proper the government? They are doing a fine job at everything else!

How do you know they're not.
 

moondg

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Do you see a lot of stories on every channel about abortion?
I am just saying that the news Media has a way of picking things that are easy stories the abuse of children is one everyone sees as wrong. (Except for the ones doing it ) even murders in prison will kill a inmate that is in there for child abuse.
 

Gina B

Active Member
Are there people that do not get angry when their kid does something crazy? Sometimes I wonder if people who spank have it backwards. Young kids are easier to talk to and guide. But when older, there are truly dangerous things they get into sometimes, and that is when people just try talking.
They will smack a little three year old for sneaking an extra cookie, though at that age TALKING works fine for the majority and they LIKE talking to you, but a teenager endangers their life and others during a joy ride and is having behaviors that could land them in prison if done later, and suddenly it's time to just talk, at an age when most aren't very much into talking about it.
If someone is going to spank/switch, I don't get why they do that to such young kids when the older ones tend to do more wild stuff.

BTW, one of my kids was one that had that temperament where a simple look broke her heart. Those ones are dangerous. LOL You get worried about looking at them wrong! Poor kid...
 

righteousdude2

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Your statement is a little racist, but true to form!

http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/nba-b...he-south--whips-their-children-202259157.html


Note that I am not talking about abuse. But spanking. I don't think this is anything unique to Southern Blacks. Southern Whites, Northern Blacks and Northern Whites all used to "whip" their children with switches, belts, etc. Gosh we used to get paddled when I was in school.

Perhaps this "you can't whip them" attitude is part of the reason why kids are out of control. Too much government intervention in parents simply disciplining their kids.

While I don't know the details of the Adrian Peterson story, I just don't have a problem with a parent DISCIPLINING THEIR child.

I can't think of a time that I got a "whippin"(in my best Southern dialect) from my parents or my grandparents that it didn't leave a welt or a raised mark. They weren't supposed to be soft.

But if welts are the criteria, Charles is right. Just about everyone in the South and the North too who ever used a switch or belt on their child would be in jail.

This seems to be more of the enemies work to destroy the family by taking away something God says that parents are to do.

I hate to always be pulling or drawing from experience, but experience is earned, and it should be shared!

As a Social Worker with State of Californian Licensing, we had maybe twenty complaints from day-care providers for having parents who caused injuries to the children through discipline.

By injury, I mean severe bruising and cuts. The bruising was almost always on the butt, legs, and lower back, but the licensed provider was mandated, as was I, to report suspected abuses.

Investigating these cases each year always turned up the same excuse. It was usually, 90% of the time, a black family. And in talking with the parents, I heard they same thing, "Well, I was only doing what my mama or daddy did to me as a child, and what my grandparents, my mom and daddy's parents did to them, as children!"

Knowing we'd hear the same excuse each time, made the investigation just a tad easier, but it still had to be turned over to the local social services, child abuse workers to do the in-depth investigation of whether this was abuse or just a parent exercising their parental rights?

It usually took a month to hear back from the county DPSS, and in each case, and I can't remember any variance from this conclusion, the DPSS worker and supervisor, after interviewing the parent, the kid and other family members, neighbors, etc., the parents were cited for excessive discipline and sent to parenting classes!

Look, I saw the results of these "whooping" and they were excessive. I felt that regardless of a parent doing what they had done to them, there are newer and better ways to deal with the discipline of your children. Leaving cuts, scabs, welts and bruising, is excessive!

I can't remember, in 14 years, any of these parents losing custody. They always got their hands slapped and placed in a diversionary program to give them more appropriate parenting skills!

So while I feel Zaac is borderline racist with his comments, the facts bear out that most of your middle or lower class families mete out this brand of discipline.

As a parent, I can't agree with hurting your children, physically or emotionally. I have seen more positive parenting skills taught and learned and applied, and believe today's parents do not need to use that which they were getting as a kid to raise a good, responsible kid! In fact, quite the opposite, these kids who are physically and emotionally abused will turn out like their parents, and abuse their kids too, and even be physical when dealing with their peers and public as a whole!

Responsible kids are not beaten into submission. They can be loved and taught the right from wrong, and grow up to be nonviolent as adults! IMHO, as a paent and professional in child care, and parenting and counseling, I think the time for beating your kids have come and gone! :tear: My experience in this subject is extensive, and I spent four years running five different Parents Anonymous Groups! I feel well versed in abuse and alternatives, and I believe we should try new and distinctive methods to reading the kids! Rasing the kids by the book is not a bad thing, but if all else fails, then you can resort to the book, being used on the rearend, to make a point, once in a while!
 
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Use of Time

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I hate to always be pulling or drawing from experience, but experience is earned, and it should be shared!

As a Social Worker with State of Californian Licensing, we had maybe twenty complaints from day-care providers for having parents who caused injuries to the children through discipline.

By injury, I mean severe bruising and cuts. The bruising was almost always on the butt, legs, and lower back, but the licensed provider was mandated, as was I, to report suspected abuses.

Investigating these cases each year always turned up the same excuse. It was usually, 90% of the time, a black family. And in talking with the parents, I heard they same thing, "Well, I was only doing what my mama or daddy did to me as a child, and what my grandparents, my mom and daddy's parents did to them, as children!"

Knowing we'd hear the same excuse each time, made the investigation just a tad easier, but it still had to be turned over to the local social services, child abuse workers to do the in-depth investigation of whether this was abuse or just a parent exercising their parental rights?

It usually took a month to hear back from the county DPSS, and in each case, and I can't remember any variance from this conclusion, the DPSS worker and supervisor, after interviewing the parent, the kid and other family members, neighbors, etc., the parents were cited for excessive discipline and sent to parenting classes!

Look, I saw the results of these "whooping" and they were excessive. I felt that regardless of a parent doing what they had done to them, there are newer and better ways to deal with the discipline of your children. Leaving cuts, scabs, welts and bruising, is excessive!

I can't remember, in 14 years, any of these parents losing custody. They always got their hands slapped and placed in a diversionary program to give them more appropriate parenting skills!

So while I feel Zaac is borderline racist with his comments, the facts bear out that most of your middle or lower class families mete out this brand of discipline.

As a parent, I can't agree with hurting your children, physically or emotionally. I have seen more positive parenting skills taught and learned and applied, and believe today's parents do not need to use that which they were getting as a kid to raise a good, responsible kid! In fact, quite the opposite, these kids who are physically and emotionally abused will turn out like their parents, and abuse their kids too, and even be physical when dealing with their peers and public as a whole!

Responsible kids are not beaten into submission. They can be loved and taught the right from wrong, and grow up to be nonviolent as adults! IMHO, as a paent and professional in child care, and parenting and counseling, I think the time for beating your kids have come and gone! :tear: My experience in this subject is extensive, and I spent four years running five different Parents Anonymous Groups! I feel well versed in abuse and alternatives, and I believe we should try new and distinctive methods to reading the kids! Rasing the kids by the book is not a bad thing, but if all else fails, then you can resort to the book, being used on the rearend, to make a point, once in a while!

Solid post but I didn't see anything remotely racist in Zach's comment. Most of his comments were discussing Barkley's position.
 

righteousdude2

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I wish everyone was as concerned about abortion as they are someone whipping there children if abortion is legal at 9 months why not 21 years old or 40? The press picks there fights. They what they can get the most run out of. I do not think children should be abused but what is the definition of abuse? who decides what punishment is proper the government? They are doing a fine job at everything else!

First of all, let me welcome you to the board .... I see you are relatively new.

Second, and more importantly .... the majority of those on this board does CARE about the murder of unborn children through the act of abortion! It's just that this is not the subject matter of this topic/OP.

It is never a wise thing to shift or redirect the direction of an OP, as it serves no purpose other than to deflect from the importance of the topic being discussed.

Since you are new to the board, it behooves you to stay on the topic; and should you feel led to discuss another issue; you have every right accorded to you as a member to start your VERY OWN THREAD, on, let's say, the sin of abortion!

I know you would get a lot of response on the topic, so instead of trying to derail this thread [which is very important to parenting among believers], start your own. Shalom! :thumbs:
 

righteousdude2

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Solid post but I didn't see anything remotely racist in Zach's comment. Most of his comments were discussing Barkley's position.

No negative indifference meant for Zaac. Just an opinion on his observation and even mine! What I referred to was his words about this kind of discipline being meted out by Southern black families! Some may think this is being racial, but the expereince I have had, is that it is true; and I don't want to be viewed as racist for saying this! :smilewinkgrin:

Like I said, while 90% of the abuse cases involving discipline, 10% were still from races other than blacks! One of the offenders is white, but not as often as in black families!

I tend to think, and this is my opinion, that this kind of physical discipline is one of the reasons behind blacks being more aggressive, and more prone to get into physical confrontations and verbal confrontations [yelling and cussing] with others.

After all, we usually do that which we are subject to and made a victim of! And I do believe these kids become victims when subjected to physical abuse through that which some cultures call punishment and discipline. And it seems to be built into them because that is what their parents, and their parents parents knew!

It has to stop. When it does, I think we will see less violence coming out of the black culture! Again, IMHO!
 

moondg

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First of all, let me welcome you to the board .... I see you are relatively new.

Thanks but i have been here since 2004 I just do not post much i just read. You are correct i did get off subject i had read the other thread about abuse and it carried over to this one. I was not talking about the people on this board i was talking about the news meida so please read the post before you start correcting me. Thanks again for pointout that i was off subject Sorry
This is why I do not post But again thanks
 

righteousdude2

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First of all, let me welcome you to the board .... I see you are relatively new.

Thanks but i have been here since 2004 I just do not post much i just read. You are correct i did get off subject i had read the other thread about abuse and it carried over to this one. I was not talking about the people on this board i was talking about the news meida so please read the post before you start correcting me. Thanks again for pointout that i was off subject Sorry
This is why I do not post But again thanks

Well I would love to hear more from you. You may have a lot to offer. Sometimes I wish all I did was read. It would make for less stress. :smilewinkgrin: You have a good plan my brother. And I am sorry. You reminded me of the times a greeter welcomed me as a new person because they never seen me at church before :laugh:
 

InTheLight

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Do you see a lot of stories on every channel about abortion?
I am just saying that the news Media has a way of picking things that are easy stories the abuse of children is one everyone sees as wrong. (Except for the ones doing it ) even murders in prison will kill a inmate that is in there for child abuse.

Ah, I see another person that does not understand the concept of a news cycle.
 

moondg

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Oh i under stand i am a photographer for a local paper. You go with what darws intrest at that monent next week or day will be whatever has the most attention at that time.
 

Zaac

Well-Known Member
No negative indifference meant for Zaac. Just an opinion on his observation and even mine! What I referred to was his words about this kind of discipline being meted out by Southern black families! Some may think this is being racial, but the expereince I have had, is that it is true; and I don't want to be viewed as racist for saying this! :smilewinkgrin:

What I REALLY said is posted for everyone else to see.
Zaac said:
Southern Whites, Northern Blacks and Northern Whites all used to "whip" their children with switches, belts, etc. Gosh we used to get paddled when I was in school.

Blacks, Whites, Hispanics and everyone else was whipping their kids when I grew up. As I traveled the world, people in India, people in South Africa, West Africa, Eastern Africa, throughout Europe, Brazil, Chile and any place I went in South America and Australia all used corporal punishment for their kids.

You spend enough time with folks and you come to find that people are pretty much the same and they discipline their children pretty much the same.

And I don't think we can say that the time for beating your kids have come and gone! Is that Biblical or does it go against what Scripture prescribes?

Like I said, while 90% of the abuse cases involving discipline, 10% were still from races other than blacks! One of the offenders is white, but not as often as in black families!
I'll have to look and see what the overall numbers would be for all types of child abuse. I would imagine that the numbers are higher in the poorer demographic and that always tends to disproportionately skew towards Blacks who have not vied as well economically as have their white counterparts.

I tend to think, and this is my opinion, that this kind of physical discipline is one of the reasons behind blacks being more aggressive, and more prone to get into physical confrontations and verbal confrontations [yelling and cussing] with others.
And I think this is the stereotypical snip that racially prejudiced, old white men have tried for decades to brand black people with because that's the narrative they were fed and it's the narrative they want to feed the current generation. Prefacing it with "I think, and this is my opinion" doesn't make it any less of a racial stereotype. Glad that you haven't been elected the voice of old white people in this country. Prayerfully us in the next generation will be absent this mess.

After all, we usually do that which we are subject to and made a victim of!
Perhaps that's why so many older white people display the same racial prejudices as with they were brought up?

And I do believe these kids become victims when subjected to physical abuse through that which some cultures call punishment and discipline. And it seems to be built into them because that is what their parents, and their parents parents knew!
Likewise for racial prejudices.

It has to stop. When it does, I think we will see less violence coming out of the black culture! Again, IMHO!
Yes it has to stop. When it does, perhaps we'll see less racial prejudice and stereotyping coming out of old, white men.:rolleyes:

I don't know how in the space of one post, you've managed to fill a good thread with this mess. SMH.
 
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JohnDeereFan

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Zaac said:
I can't think of a time that I got a "whippin"(in my best Southern dialect) from my parents or my grandparents that it didn't leave a welt or a raised mark. They weren't supposed to be soft.

In my experience, it was more about the psychological torture of having to take the long walk out to the mimosa tree and cut the switch and walk back, all the while thinking about the terrible whipping you were going to get.

I sure got my share of them, but I can't recall any whipping that was worse than the walk out to cut a switch.
 

annsni

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So here's a story for you:

I was at the doctor's office with my then 12 month old (now 22 year old). She was a feisty one, let me tell you!! So she was there in just her diaper on the table and I was playing with her waiting for the doctor. She was sitting facing me and leaned forward like she was going to hug me and I hugged her - only to have her bite me on the breast. Hard. Without letting go. With sharp baby teeth. OH MY GOSH!!! I pulled back - she didn't let go. I finally had to slap her thigh to get her to let go .... and now I'm sitting in the doctor's office with a 12 month old crying her eyes out - and with a big handprint on her thigh!!! What do I do?? A minute later the doctor walks in - just as the handprint is getting nice and red and a little swollen. I was so flustered and quickly tried to explain what happened. That pediatrician just shook his head - and handed me a gauze pad. Seems that bite was worse than I thought and I was bleeding and the blood was running down my shirt!! Fortunately, that was enough evidence to know what happened and he made sure to clean out the bite and bandage it for me (it was right inside the v-neck of my shirt) and told me he totally would have done the same thing. Fortunately by the time we left, the redness on her thigh was gone so it wasn't that big a smack but it took about a week and a half for that bite to heal!! I think that was probably the hardest I had ever spanked my kids.

That tough cookie now lives in New York City. I hope people watch out for her. She bites. ;)
 

righteousdude2

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Your opinion is noted...

What I REALLY said is posted for everyone else to see.
Blacks, Whites, Hispanics and everyone else was whipping their kids when I grew up. As I traveled the world, people in India, people in South Africa, West Africa, Eastern Africa, throughout Europe, Brazil, Chile and any place I went in South America and Australia all used corporal punishment for their kids.
You spend enough time with folks and you come to find that people are pretty much the same and they discipline their children pretty much the same.
And I don't think we can say that the time for beating your kids have come and gone! Is that Biblical or does it go against what Scripture prescribes?
I'll have to look and see what the overall numbers would be for all types of child abuse. I would imagine that the numbers are higher in the poorer demographic and that always tends to disproportionately skew towards Blacks who have not vied as well economically as have their white counterparts.
And I think this is the stereotypical crap that racially prejudiced, old white men have tried for decades to brand black people with because that's the narrative they were fed and it's the narrative they want to feed the current generation. Prefacing it with "I think, and this is my opinion" doesn't make it any less of a racial stereotype. Glad that you haven't been elected the voice of old white people in this country. Prayerfully us in the next generation will be absent this mess.
Perhaps that's why so many older white people display the same racial prejudices as with they were brought up?
Likewise for racial prejudices.
Yes it has to stop. When it does, perhaps we'll see less racial prejudice and stereotyping coming out of old, white men.:rolleyes:
I don't know how in the space of one post, you've managed to fill a good thread with this mess. SMH.

But, it is YOUR opinion! BTW - I think I discovered something that will help the majority of us better understand who you really are. It opned my eyes .... ENJOY:

 

Zaac

Well-Known Member
But, it is YOUR opinion! BTW - I think I discovered something that will help the majority of us better understand who you really are. It opned my eyes .... ENJOY:


Pure foolishness. Corrected again and all you can do is make a lame attempt to insult. Leave this thread. Be gone with ya!:thumbs:
 
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