Quitting the Ministry

[Dr. Bob]

I think the article is "right on", certainly not in the "quack" category. Focus on the Family's pastoral help program:

For some pastors, leaving the pastorate was the result of assuming that their calling was permanent and they were therefore protected. They neglected the spiritual disciplines or spiritual integrity needed to continue in ministry. They now realize that they should have given more attention to their own Christian development. They know now that ministry depends on moral purity.

The majority of my acquaintances, however, simply encountered such turmoil and situational conflict that they felt they could not continue to pastor. Too often, they had no friend or accountability group to share their pain or provide emotional or spiritual support. Many well-meaning Christians in their congregations ignored the signs of "battle fatigue." Instead, congregations overwhelmed my pastor friends with unrealistic expectations, negative criticism and misplaced anger. Some congregations even assumed the perfect pastor was "out there," so their fallible pastor was terminated.

Been there, burned out pastoring and went to teach in a Baptist College, then back into pastoring as a missionary/interim.

Add a large staff and Christian School to oversee, it is truly a gifted man that can be a pastor AND stay a pastor.

 

[dianetavegia]

Our pastor is leaving the ministry to become the State Evangelism Director for the Oklahoma General Baptist Convention. I think I have the right title.

My thoughts are... there are men who can preach and men who can pastor. There are some men who do both very well. Our pastor is one of those. However, in his new position he won't be pastoring a people.

I'm really going to miss Brother Alan and his wife. If any of you men are considering leaving the ministry.... know that there are those who admire you and appreciate your sacrifices while praising God for his calling in your lives!

Diane

 

[Dr. Bob]

I consider your pastor to be blessed to have someone with your spirit, Diane. What a joy to read.

When I left the fulltime pastorate to take a position teaching preacher-boys at an ifb college, my church gave my a lifetime subscription to U-Haul Magazine and a couple of $1 gift certificates to McDonalds.

I'm sure they felt the same way about me . .

 

[Speedpass]

I wonder if many ministers leave the ministry because they were not given adequate counsel about their initial decision to be in Christian service. For example, are wannabe pastors informed that it takes more than above-average preaching skills to be an effective pastor?

 

[Hardsheller]

Originally posted by ExxonMobil:
I wonder if many ministers leave the ministry because they were not given adequate counsel about their initial decision to be in Christian service. For example, are wannabe pastors informed that it takes more than above-average preaching skills to be an effective pastor?

Is the Pastorate a Calling or a Ministry requiring certain skills?

Do we have Preaching/teaching skills or the Spiritual Gift of Preaching/Teaching?

 

[Sherrie]

I have seen some Pastors who go into their roll as Pastor, and have to manage the Church like it was a corporation. To me that has to be a major toll in itself on any Pastor.

And I have seen my friend who is a Pastor experience this, and everyone from all angles come and complain about everything to him. He tries to visit the sick, funerals, church, business meetings, be the go between, husband, father, overseer, vision setter, and councelor, and the list goes on, and sometimes you can just see the burn-out on his face. He is 49 years old. He is a Pastor. But sometimes the way things go, you would think he was President of McDonald-Douglas/Kindergarten Teacher.

Sherrie

 

[Wisdom Seeker]

I know that some Pastors mention how the congregation doesn't want to pitch in and help. But, the church isn't supposed to be handled by one person. That's how Pastors get burnt out. And if the people in the church love their pastor they will want to help him and the church.

I would hope that he would have a meeting with his Deacons and the staff of his church, and delegate, letting the other people in the church take some of the burden off his shoulders. He's responsible, but that doesn't mean that he has to do, or is supposed to do it all.

 

[David Ekstrom]

An assumption is made here that a pastor leaving the ministry is not the will of God. There must be sin; there must be discouragement; or the person must never have been in God's will in the first place.
I had a very successful ministry in my first pastorate. I believed it was God's will for me to move on and do some graduate work. I became active as a member of the church I attended. The Sr. Pastor asked me to join staff there part-time while I finished school. I agreed, then my daughter was born. There was no way I could support my family on a pastor's salary, so my wife continued working, I stayed on part-time to be a stay-at-home dad and remained part-time at the church. I am fully convinced this was God's will for me.
Now, it happens that I want to get back full-time in the pastorate, but I can envision quite easily a scenario in which some man may have been called for a time to serve. After finishing that assignment, there is nothing in Scripture that I can think of that would imply that a return to "secular" work would be somehow less holy. We need to realize that we get the idea that the pastorate is an "estate" from Rome. The pastorate is a function, a gift, an office. It is not an estate, like holy matrimony.
It's not fair to lay people to assume that pastors are somehow "holier" than they are. And it's not fair to pastors who have felt it was God's will for them not to continue in ministry to paint them with the picture that they are somehow out of God's will.

 

[Elk]

Originally posted by Rev. Joshua:
Diane,

According to this article (and the friends I still have in that church) they are divorced.

Having grown up in that church, I can't say I blame her.

Joshua

Dear Rev. Joshua,
May I ask, what was it like growing up in that church, and why did you say that?
I would appreciate knowing.
It would mean a lot to me.
Thank you.

 

[Trotter]

Although not yet a pastor (but I do believe that is where I am being called), I have to say that discouragement can be a huge factor. Add to that human pride and a luke-warm or hostile congregation, and you have a very volitile mixture that will most likely end with a resignation, if not an out-right leaving of the pastoral field.

Thus far in my pilgramage, I have encountered the vulture of discouragement many times. I see several who accepted their calling after I did advance beyond me. I watch many being called to fill in, to interim positions, offered pastorates. I have watched a ministry that I was a part of slowly dwindle and almost die (although I kept right on plugging), only to be highjacked by an outside force. I have seen many that I counselled with turn their backs. I have felt the sharp pain of sin in my life, and the loneliness of the distancing of God from it. Many of those times, discouragement reared its ugly head, and I have comtemplated just throwing in the towel and going home.

But, as was said before, I am called by God. Not asked, not given a maybe, but singled out for use and purpose. Sitting on the sidelines (my perception) is hard, especially when you want to carry the ball. However, I realize that I'm still junior varsity, and not on first string yet. But it still gets hard at times.

I can understand and sympathize with those who have been wounded, and with those who thought that the cost was too high. God doesn't call some one for a season. He calls men into a lifetime of service. While that role may change, the term of service doesn't.

In Christ,
Trotter

 

[Jim1999]

The attitude I assumed when starting out was to preach myself out of a job. See the elect come to Christ; see the saved called into service; preach the word and let God be God; let the deacons manage the church business and take care of the God...ly business, which was my calling. It seemed to work for me.

Cheers,

Jim

 

[psalm-man]

In our denomination over the last decade or two, about a thousand pastors a year are fired. This does not count those who resign just short of being fired. Nor does it count the other ministry staff who face similar circumstances. It could be more like ten thousand a year. Many of these are wounded, as well as their families. Does it seem that not many people care. I have attended some retreats to meet these families. They need much more time than a week-end. Few pastors are interested in this kind of ministry. Denominations do very little. We need much more.

 

[gb93433]

Originally posted by psalm-man:
In our denomination over the last decade or two, about a thousand pastors a year are fired. This does not count those who resign just short of being fired. Nor does it count the other ministry staff who face similar circumstances. It could be more like ten thousand a year. Many of these are wounded, as well as their families. Does it seem that not many people care. I have attended some retreats to meet these families. They need much more time than a week-end. Few pastors are interested in this kind of ministry. Denominations do very little. We need much more.

It's kind of like the bumper sticker you see now that goes somewhat like, "Keep me safe from Christ's followers."

Even the world is now aware of the condition of the state of the church in America.

I have heard a number of people predict that America will soon become a mission field where other countries will send their missionaries.

I am personally convinced that God is doing some pruning. Churches will not have pastors and have their doors open unless they do business with God. Why should a church have a pastor unless it will do God's will? If it will not be obedient to God then why have a pastor just to keep the doors open for the social club?

 

[Carl B]

I have heard a number of people predict that America will soon become a mission field where other countries will send their missionaries.

I can tell you for a fact that it has already started. I personally have met a missionary that was called to the state of washington.

The church in america today really needs to stop the backbiting and get on their knees in repentance and stay there.

 

[Pastork]

I have been reading this thread with great interest, but I have to say that I cannot fathom ever seriously considering leaving pastoral ministry. I have been at Immanuel for about ten years now and have been tempted to leave this church a few times, but never to leave pastoral ministry. I don't think I could live without teaching and shepherding God's people. Even with all the trials and tribulations, I cannot imagine being truly happy doing anything else. It is what my life is about. Even if one day I taught in a Bible college to help train other pastors, I would have to be involved heavily in pastoral ministry in a local church, to at least help another pastor in his ministry. I guess kind of like Dr. bob, who has been unable to stay away...because he has been called by God and been given a pastor's heart. That is me in a nutshell.

Pastork

http://www.immanuelhomepage.org/
http://immanuelforum.org/phpbb/

 

[blackbird]

I once had a preacher I thought was fixin' to quit ministry----I made the comment somethin' like, "Ummmmmmmm! Can I have your library??" He didn't think it was too, too funny!

Blackbird

 

[RevGood]

The pastor is on call 24 hours a day and has to be available for weddings, funerals, hospital calls, shut ins, visitation, all services...

This is the problem. 24 hours a day! Show me that in the Bible. Show me where it says "Thou shalt be available to the people 24 hours a day." Chapter and verse please. That is a tradition of lazy and selfish laity who wouldn't lift a finger to help another if their life depended on it. They expect the pastor to do it. I will be available 24/7 for the people when they are available 24/7 for me. People need to quit looking so much to the shepherd (little "s") and more to The Shepherd! God help us.

 

[Hardsheller]

Originally posted by RevGood:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr /> The pastor is on call 24 hours a day and has to be available for weddings, funerals, hospital calls, shut ins, visitation, all services...

This is the problem. 24 hours a day! Show me that in the Bible. Show me where it says "Thou shalt be available to the people 24 hours a day." Chapter and verse please. That is a tradition of lazy and selfish laity who wouldn't lift a finger to help another if their life depended on it. They expect the pastor to do it. I will be available 24/7 for the people when they are available 24/7 for me. People need to quit looking so much to the shepherd (little "s") and more to The Shepherd! God help us. </font>[/QUOTE]Preach it Brother!

They want you to go to the nursing home every week and visit the church members who are there but they never go!

Then when somebody gets neglected they point a finger at you and say, "Pastor, you're not doing your job!"

 

[Karen]

Originally posted by Hardsheller:
</font><blockquote>quote:</font><hr />Originally posted by RevGood:
.........

This is the problem. 24 hours a day!........That is a tradition of lazy and selfish laity who wouldn't lift a finger to help another if their life depended on it. They expect the pastor to do it. I will be available 24/7 for the people when they are available 24/7 for me.......

They want you to go to the nursing home every week and visit the church members who are there but they never go!

Then when somebody gets neglected they point a finger at you and say, "Pastor, you're not doing your job!" </font>[/QUOTE]Sounds like the two of you are not that happy with the members of your church. I can't speak to your individual circumstances.
But I would like to point out that many times the members of your church are busier than you think.
They just didn't necessarily give you a report later.

I have seen my husband, a deacon, crawl off the plane with serious jetlag after working a 100 hour week, and I drove him to the hospital so we could pray with sick people on his deacon list.
I don't know that the pastor knew about it afterwards.

MANY people have jobs in which they are on call 24/7. And work more than 40 hours per week.
The pastor of my church works between 40-50 hours per week, according to my understanding. That includes church services. And no one bothers him on his day off except for a death or the church being on fire. And I think it should be this way.

Most people in the same church that have jobs work 60 plus hours per week and go to church and church activities on top of that, many times giving up days off and vacations for church responsibilities. A number of people spend all of their vacations being chaperones at Falls Creek, an enormous Baptist camp in OK. The pastor takes his vacation afterwards.
I have spent a lot of time visiting in nursing homes and not just with my relatives. My relatives and many of the others couldn't have told you five minutes later that I had been there.
I'm not quite sure how you know all of this about your members.

What I am really getting to is you both sound kind of angry. Get to know your members better, and you might be amazed what is really going on in their lives. On the other hand, you might just both be in impossible situations. If so, I am sorry.

Karen

 

[j_barner2000]

I believe there are some folks doing the Lord's business and many more who are warming pews. There is a statistic that says that 20 percent of the people do 80% of the work. With this being the case and knowing how much time I spend as pastoral intern and Children's ministry director I can see how someone can burn out. All I can say is that we have failed to teach our congregations that the job of the teachers and preachers is to train the Church to be about ministry.

Last sermon I did pretty much pointed to the fact that Jesus spent 3 years teaching the disciples how to continue and multiply His Earthly ministry. That is the model I am trying to follow with the people I have working children's church. I cannot reach all of the kids and their families by myself. So I am grooming and preparing them to continue and expand our ministry.

However like with the Judges and many of the prophets of old... Sometimes the call is only for a season and then back to obscurity.