The rod

[Bob Alkire]

Listen, people...there is a difference between corporal punishment and physical abuse.

So true!!!

 

[Magnetic Poles]

Listen, people...there is a difference between corporal punishment and physical abuse. I know firsthand...I was physically abused as a child. While I would never abuse one of my children, I do use corporal punishment when it is necessary. My husband and I are complemented frequently on how well our children behave because they know if they don't there will be consequences. Paddling a child is not wrong...beating a child is. Just make sure you know the difference before you go threatening to turn people in to a fascist organization like CPS...they are far more likely to remove a child who is being lovingly disciplined than one who is truly being abused in my experience. And no, I have never lost any of my children...that observation is based on the fact that they did not want to remove myself or my sister when were being abused as kids, but they sure do like to butt into the lives of other people I know now, as an adult, who do not beat their kids but do believe in using corporal punishment. :BangHead:

And so, the cycle of violence continues to yet another generation. :tear:

 

[standingfirminChrist]

And so, the cycle of violence continues to yet another generation. :tear:

Spanking a child is not violence. Beating a child is.

 

[Sopranette]

Which is another reason not to use a rod. It's way too easy to go overboard, even accidentally.
Corporal punishment should never be the sole means of discipline. It may work in some situations, but certainly not all. When my kids are having a temper tantrum, the very worse thing I could do at that time is physically discipline them. It's much more effective to give them a "time out" and let them cool down by themselves. Besides, my kids hate being excluded from fun activities more than anything else.

love,

Sopranette

 

[Joe]

And so, the cycle of violence continues to yet another generation. :tear:

Yes, it looks that way. Taking pride you have such well-behaved children "because they know the consequences" is very sad when the consequences are inflicting physical violence upon their own offspring. Bad mouthing CPS probably isn't the smartest idea either.

 

[Rubato 1]

It's funny that for 5950 years, the way to rear children was through corporal punishment, but now society knows better. This philosophy has really made an 'impact' on our culture.

 

[Magnetic Poles]

for 5950 years,

:laugh: Hoo boy!

 

[abcgrad94]

Our goal as parents is to bring up our children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Any bully can brandish a big stick to make people do what he wants. Big deal. It takes much more maturity and patience and godliness to actually train a child's heart so he will have a true desire to do right, not just to avoid getting whacked. Teaching someone to obey only out of fear may produce short term results, but not true respect for authority. This is why so many kids reared in "Christian" homes rebel and the parents can't figure out why. They didn't take the time and effort to train the child's heart.

 

[jakers]

I don't really have anything against spanking, but I know that when my little boy first discovered hitting, I really changed my mind about spanking. He would playfully swat at me (he was around 2 years old) and my first reaction was to spank him.....to show him that hitting was wrong! I couldn't process how that would work in my head!

So, I tend to look for other methods and it's worked on both of my kids.

 

[youngmom4]

And so, the cycle of violence continues to yet another generation. :tear:

Spanking is not violence...beating is. Violence was my dad beating me so bad that I had cuts and bruises from my ears all the way down to my knees. I do NOT use violence with my children. They do, however, get a good spanking when the need arises.

 

[youngmom4]

Yes, it looks that way. Taking pride you have such well-behaved children "because they know the consequences" is very sad when the consequences are inflicting physical violence upon their own offspring. Bad mouthing CPS probably isn't the smartest idea either.

No, I guess I should just let my kids be like so many others today and run around doing whatever they please, right? Give me a break. It's a scientifically proven fact that kids need structure, rules, and known consequences to thrive. Part of our known consequences is a spanking for any offense that warrants it. Other offenses might only garner being grounded or having their mouth washed out. The punishment fits the crime in all situations, and my kids behave because of it. As for CPS, I'm not scared of them or anyone else. My kids are my kids, and I will raise them how I choose. I am not harming them in any way, so it's nobody else's business.

 

[youngmom4]

Which is another reason not to use a rod. It's way too easy to go overboard, even accidentally.
Corporal punishment should never be the sole means of discipline. It may work in some situations, but certainly not all. When my kids are having a temper tantrum, the very worse thing I could do at that time is physically discipline them. It's much more effective to give them a "time out" and let them cool down by themselves. Besides, my kids hate being excluded from fun activities more than anything else.

love,

Sopranette

You're right...the punishment should fit the crime, and corporal punishment shouldn't be your sole means of discipline. However, it is an effective punishment in some cases, and people should not be afraid to use corporal punishment when necessary. On the other hand, if you are at a high risk to become an abuser, you should not use physical punishment unless you are 100% certain that you can remain in control. My rule for myself is that I do not discipline while I'm angry. Because I was abused as a child, I have a high risk of becoming an abuser. Therefore, I am extra careful about how I discipline. I would never, ever hurt any of my kids for any reason. If I do not feel that I can discipline in a controlled manner, I will forego physical punishment and use something else. Generally, I send the child to their room for a while and allow both of us a cooling off period before I spank...that way, I can make sure that I am in complete control of myself. If I'm still angry, I will either have my husband do the spanking or just skip it entirely in favor of something else.

 

[Magnetic Poles]

Spanking is not violence...beating is. Violence was my dad beating me so bad that I had cuts and bruises from my ears all the way down to my knees. I do NOT use violence with my children. They do, however, get a good spanking when the need arises.

Typical pattern, and it explains a lot.

 

[Revmitchell]

Pr 23:13 - Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die.

 

[standingfirminChrist]

Proverbs 13:24 He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.

spareth his rod. Although contrary to modern humanistic child psychology, the Bible clearly teaches—especially here in the book of Proverbs—that judicious corporal punishment, if administered carefully and lovingly, as well as appropriately, is necessary in child-raising. Note also such Scriptures as Proverbs 22:15; 23:13-14; 29:15, etc. -- KJV Defender's Study Bible

 

[Allan]

Typical pattern, and it explains a lot.

Of course! And why not? You of all people on here should be shouting it as truth and a necessary aspect FOR truth.
It proves one of your core views- monkey see, monkey do. (evolution) :laugh:

Sorry, it was to funny. I couldn't resist

 

[Isaiah40:28]

I don't really have anything against spanking, but I know that when my little boy first discovered hitting, I really changed my mind about spanking. He would playfully swat at me (he was around 2 years old) and my first reaction was to spank him.....to show him that hitting was wrong! I couldn't process how that would work in my head!

So, I tend to look for other methods and it's worked on both of my kids.

No one can know for certain the details of the situation you mentioned, but this is what I don't understand about the "hitting" begets "hitting" mentality.
Children who were never spanked, hit, slap, punch, knock down, etc. in anger or frustration others around them.
Where did they learn that?

Other children who have been spanked by parents who are in engaged in loving discipline, rarely if ever, hit, slap, punch, knock down others in anger or frustration.
Why not?
If the supposed theory of "hitting" begets "hitting" is true and proven by behavioral scientists, et al. , then why is it the "unspanked" who hit and not just the "spanked"?
Shouldn't the "spanked" kids be the ones beating the tar out of their unspanked peers?
I have several young relatives who have never been spanked, whose moms are home fulltime and are wonderful playmates and teachers of their small offspring, but yet these little boys are some of the most violent bullies I know of.
Why?
By all rights, it should be my spanked son doing the hitting, yet he has more times than I care to remember been the unfortunate recipient of bullied hits by known and unknown assailants, some even younger than himself. And since more parents today are against spanking than in favor, chances are, it was done exclusively by unspanked "violent" bullies who have learned to be good sinners.
And to date, he has never hit anyone. He has other vices.

He understands that a spanking on the bum is done by mommy and daddy
who love him and want him to learn to obey God while he is young and avoid worse consequences as an adult.
It is not because mommy and daddy are bigger and stronger and angrier. It is because sin must be acknowledged and dealt with in order to avoid divine discipline and punishment.
And physical discipline is one of the means God has given parents to deal with sinful hearts in their children.
Also, boasting in well-behaved children is foolish and immature.
God is gracious to all of us, spankers and non-spankers, because we all sin against Him and our children and do not deserve His mercy in our lives.
So if our children, unspanked, grow up to love and serve Him, all glory to Him.
And if our spanked children do as well, all glory to Him.

I have no desire to see unspanked children grow up to be unrepentant wretches. I pray that God will mercifully save them as I hope the same for our children who we do spank on occasion.

 

[Joe]

Pr 23:13 - Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die.

So beating a child with a rod, causing bruises & cuts, stripes(scars) on their skin from head to toe, some of which youngmom described is alright as long as the children do not die? I say this because this is the only verse you have offered in this post

 

[Revmitchell]

So beating a child with a rod, causing bruises & cuts, stripes(scars) on their skin from head to toe, some of which youngmom described is alright as long as the children do not die? I say this because this is the only verse you have offered in this post

Is that what you pull out of this passage from the "Bible".

 

[Joe]

Is that what you pull out of this passage from the "Bible".

I asked you first ...

Either you believe it is ok to beat a child with a rod like the bible says, or you do not. This is for everyone who holds to this belief.
If we beat a child with a rod he will not die? Of course he could die if we beat him with a rod :BangHead: We are trying to modify this verse, to tone it down to re-label it spanking.

The rod is figurative. It can't be read any other way. See my post #2