What do you do if you have a problem and there seems to be no solution?

[bound]

I am depressed, yes. But I am not depressed for no reason. I am depressed because of real problems. This means that talking is not going to erase those real problems. I can talk all day and it still wouldn't solve my problems. Counseling helps when you are simply depressed and have problems which can be solved through talking.

Well, I would say 'good' counseling can lead to 'good' actions. Sometimes the problems we see as insurmountable may be surmountable with the proper guidance. I, of course, don't know what your problems are but seeking good counseling can do very little harm, in my humble opinion.

Two of the big parts of my faith is Trust and Hope. I put my Truth in God and I Hope that my Truth is enough.

I don't have any assurance that my life will be particularly good or bad. It is always my Hope that following the teachings of our Faith will be wise guidance but I don't know God's Plan for my life. Regardless, I have to Trust Him. In a certain sense, this is a kind of yielding my life to the grace of God and His mercy. Of course, I do make choices and I live my life but I do so ultimately knowing that God has a Plan.

I don't know why you are depressed. I don't know what has happened in your life or why the things happened in your life the way that they have. Further dialogue would be necessary but I'm not sure you are in a position to Trust and Hope in God. So I don't know if such dialogue would ultimately serve any good for you or us on the Baptist Forum.

 

[Helen]

xdx, I may get kicked off the Baptist Board for this, but first of all, what do you do if you have a problem and there seems to be no solution?

You join the human race.

Second, you take your attention off of yourself. I have read tons of your posts and they are about as self-centered as any I know. God is not your personal Santa Claus who is going to poof away your emotions. It's His business to raise you up into the image of Christ. You want problems? Take a look at Christ's life here on earth -- ridiculed, reviled, tortured, crucified. You want alone? Who was there He could actually see and touch who understood His situation? You can expect pain and lonliness if you want to be transformed into the image of Christ. The cross comes before glory.

He left us two laws: love the Lord your God with ALL your heart, soul, mind, and strength, and then love your neighbor as yourself.

You appear to be deeply in love with yourself. You are what you talk about the most. Start paying as much attention to others, and helping them, as you pay to yourself and I guarantee your attitude will change.

Anyone who is so wrapped up in themselves as you appear to be is naturally going to smother.

 

[hillclimber1]

Very well said Helen.

 

[xdisciplex]

You appear to be deeply in love with yourself. You are what you talk about the most. Start paying as much attention to others, and helping them, as you pay to yourself and I guarantee your attitude will change.

It was a mistake expecting help on a place like this, it's senseless.

 

[Helen]

What did you want any of us to do, wave a magic wand? You have doctors and you have the Lord and you have His commands to get your eyes OFF yourself.

We have listened and listened to you. We have answered questions over and over again. People are praying for you.

What was it you were expecting?

 

[xdisciplex]

Forget it, you don't understand it.

These are the typical standard advice which you can pretty much give to everybody who has problems no matter if it's a 911 trauma victim or somebody who is scared of diseases or somebody who is scared of something else. It's so easy. The solution for all problems. Simply focus on others. Yeah! Start to sell lemonade and donate the money to the poor. Or start helping an old woman across the street and all of a sudden all your problems will be gone. Yay! They will all vanish. But wait! What do you do if you come home after a day filled with activities such as selling lemonade, helping old women across the street, teaching orphans, cooking for homeless people and rescuing a poor cat from a tree and then all of a sudden you realize that the problem is still there? What do you do then? When after psyching yourself up and distracting yourself everything suddenly comes back and hits you again?
Well, maybe then you realize that you cannot simply run away from everything.
Maybe I should simply get drunk all day, this way I could also forget about everything. :BangHead:

 

[Helen]

What do you do when you come home from the end of a day like that? Thank God that despite your own problems you were still able to be of help to someone else in the world. And you are able to put your own problems in perspective.

And then you fall into bed exhausted. Please don't forget to eat a decent meal first. When you work that hard, you need to keep yourself in shape.

 

[Helen]

My husband just reminded me of the passage: "If any man would follow me, let him take up his cross and deny himself...."

That's from the Lord Himself.

 

[xdisciplex]

Do you think this is funny or do you think I'm dumb? This feels like you're making fun of me. But I give you the benefit of a doubt and rather assume that you simply don't understand it but then you also shouldn't give advice because your advice feel like mockery. You think you simply come along with a few phrases like "focus on others" and then everything is fine how stupid do you think I am? Do you think that if there was a psychological trick or another way of simply suppressing my problem then I would not have found it in over 12 months?!
You have no idea! And this angers me. You have no clue how I feel and how I suffer and you cannot comprehend it at all so don't come up with a few phrases and think that it's that easy because it is not. If it was that easy I would have found a way to overcome it or to cope with it! I am not new to the business of fears. I have been having fears since I was a child and I know a few tricks to overcome fears but it doesn't work with this one but why do I even explain myself it's senseless anyway.

 

[Claudia_T]

xdisciplex

Its really true and just that simple.

If you would begin to focus on helping others you would be amazed at the changes in yourself. Go back and read Isaiah 58 that I gave to you.

Not only that but you need to start LOOKING for the love of God in the Bible instead of keeping on looking for contradictions and some sort of an angry God.


Claudia

 

[Helen]

You are not the only one who has had to deal with major problems. Many of us have. We are telling you that the Bible knows what it is talking about.

I was left by my highschool sweetheart after 20 years of marriage when he walked out on me and six children. Five were adopted special case kids. They ranged in ages, when he left, from 6 to 17 years old. I cried for a year, literally, before I was even able to START picking up the pieces.

When I was eleven I was diagnosed with a form of arthritis which has been with me through the years. My second surgery, when I was sixteen, resulted in the doctors telling me I would never walk again. I did anyway.

When I was 26 I had a total knee replacement done -- I was in the medical journals as the youngest person on record to receive one. Guess what? It was a failure before I got out of the hospital. I walked for five years in pain and then had another one done when I was 32.

I was kicked in the gut by a horse when I was 21 and lost a little girl when I was pregnant with her. I am now diabetic because I only have half a pancreas from that kick. Diabetes makes everything worse, including arthritis.

I live in pain every day of my life. I have a 22 year old son who is too retarded to ever be on his own. He had encephalitis when he was three (after we adopted him), and today his IQ is too low to be measured, i.e. it is below 20. He cannot speak, will always be in diapers (none of which match his bladder capacity) and is autistic. We just found out today that the respite care we thought we would be able to have two half-days a week would cost us more than we can afford. I cried. I would LOVE to have some time off to just go out to lunch with my husband...

You want to trade places?

Actually, if you knew me, you might want to, except I'm a girl and you are a guy. Because I have so much joy inside me from what the Lord has done with my life that I consider my life incredible. God has used me in ways I never would have expected or even thought about. He has protected and guided me for all these years, through all the pain and heartbreak and everything else.

I'm not mocking you. I'm telling you that the only possible answer for you is to get your thoughts and eyes off yourself and get them on a hurting world around you.

It works. I know.

 

[xdisciplex]

I'm sorry that you also have a hard life.
I don't want to get in the who has a harder life competition, this doesn't matter anyway because it's all relative. I cannot deal with such things very well. I'm not so aggrieved on purpose. I am simply tired. If you were able to help yourself by helping other then this is good but I don't think this works for me and besides this I have no "others". And please no unrealistic advice like for example: Join the boy scouts and help build houses for homeless people.
I think this isn't going anywhere and this whole debate also upsets me and drags me down even further because it makes me feel guilty which doesn't really contribute to my mood.

 

[Ed Edwards]

Originally Posted by Amy.G

That is what I take and have for years. It's very safe and I've had ZERO side effects other than making me feel like a normal person again. You have nothing to worry about. I thought maybe it was prozac or wellbutrin. Those have side effects. Please take you medicine. It will help.

I take Wellbutrin without sides (the results of others may vary).
I have a family friend and she helps stay balanced using
prozac (she has no sides either)..

In fact, I've not seen a scientific study, but there would have to
be 8,000 prozac induced self-destructions to equal
the non-prozac crowd.

Xdisciplex: //Do you: mean I shall just sit there
and wait for God to do a miracle?//

I really don't mean that.
But if you get despert enough, you might try it.

 

[Helen]

xdx, unless you live in a cave and never see anyone else anywhere, you have 'others.' We all do. We can shut our eyes to them or reach out. Our choice.

 

[genesis12]

Hello. Long time no post. I just want to say that I have been working privately with (xdisciplex) since April 2006. What he describes here on the BB is just scratching the surface of a much greater problem. I just want to express my appreciation to those of you who take a gentle and positive approach to helping him. I noted several of that caliber in this thread: Amy is a good example. He is a brilliant young man who needs lots of caring concern. He knows what sin is, what it is all about, and doesn't need to be reminded in your posts. :saint:

Thanks for reminding him that no matter what, God loves him, is not going to punish him, and will never leave him. Please be responsive to his posts, rather than debating each other. I cherish your prayers for our Brother in Christ who is having a very difficult time. God's blessings!

(xdisciple x), you didn't know I would post this; you didn't tell me to, or give me permission. I love you in Christ, my Brother. Believe it, receive it, in Jesus' Holy Name. You're going to get through this. :flower:

 

[Amy.G]

You're going to get through this.

:thumbsup: Amen

 

[Helen]

Genesis 12, I tried to PM you but you don't accept either them or emails. Please email me.

Thank you.

 

[PastorSBC1303]

xd, what is it that you would like to happen in this situation? Do you have a desired end?

 

[Scarlett O.]

Thanks for reminding him that no matter what, God loves him, is not going to punish him, and will never leave him. Please be responsive to his posts, rather than debating each other. I cherish your prayers for our Brother in Christ who is having a very difficult time. God's blessings!

Well, you are seemingly the only person privy to this information.

Those of who have talked to xdx both publicly and via private messaging who can only base our responses to him based on the face value of his questions.

None of us really know each other here. We can't see each other, we can't interpret body language or facial expressions, and we can't hear any voice inflections.

We don't know each other's backgrounds....not really and we don't know the intimate details of each other's joys and pain.

Everyone faces burdens. I dare say that everyone on the BB could give a tragic account of how life, at times, can beat you to a bloody pulp, whether it be physically, emotionally, spiritually, and relationship-wise.

Not one single person on this BB has not experienced death of loved ones. There are people on this board who have lost spouses, parents, and/or children, including their unborn. There are people on this board who suffer with physical ailments that would rival Job's.

There are people on this board who either are or have been intimately familiar with the devil, himself, via depression, loneliness, fear, rage, sins they unable to shake, sickness, loss, and much more.

We ALL have experience hell in one fashion or another, whether it be thrust upon us or whether it be self-inflicted.

And unless we know the specifics of xdx's problem, which I personally don't think that needs to be shared unless he feels like it, then everyone on this board has given him the only spiritual counsel that we can.

Yes, life can be absolutely and totally crappy....yes, we suffer.....yes, someetimes we wonder where God is in it all.

But those us of who have persevered know this.

During the battles of life, we cling to God. We read His word, we pray, we praise Him, we seek to lift the burden of others, and even in our tears, we know that God holds in the palm of His hand. Sometimes we lie in that Hand broken and bleeding, but we lie in the safety and shelter of it nonetheless.

This life on this earth at this time was not meant to be a trip through a bed of roses.

All we know of xdx is that he is suffering. We have tried to counsel him, pray with him, lead him to the truth, lead him away from false prophets, and try to get him to see that focusing his mental abilities on someone else's burden is a first step....that and seeking medical attention and following that medical attention.

I believe with all of my heart that we have been more patient with him than any other person on this board.

And we will continue to be.

Helen was right and correct in everything that she said. And she was right and correct in saying it.

We can't carry each other around on feather pillows. Sometimes we have to share honest words that can shake us up.

I, for one, care about xdx, but it gets tiresome trying to get him to understand that God is not his enemy.

I don't know what you know about him, but unless you are willing to help us understand him more, then there is no need for you to tell us anything at all.

My prayers for xdx continue......

 

[Not_hard_to_find]

Thanks for reminding him that no matter what, God loves him, is not going to punish him, and will never leave him. Please be responsive to his posts, rather than debating each other. I cherish your prayers for our Brother in Christ who is having a very difficult time. God's blessings!

We all need reminding, which is why I trust Hebrews 10:25 to be of great value "exhorting one another."

XD has not forsaken the assembling of ourselves here on the board, and he has been able to read of many prayers and great support for his situation, along with some frustration that good words have gone unheeded.

The one thing that has been consistent is that many are praying for him and will continue to do so. Letting all of us know of your private work is helpful.