Awww - thanks Marcia.

See, I absolutely see the idea of being "quickened" in the Bible. It's not the "making born again without their knowledge" that some hyper-Calvinists might believe nor is it the "God doesn't do anything at all it's all man" of the, shall I put it as hyper-Arminian (I'm sure I'm using wrong terms in this since I'm not overly educated on terms and such). But since man cannot respond to God in our spiritually dead state, we MUST somehow be made able to respond. If one doesn't believe we're spiritually dead, then there's nothing more for me to say but if one agrees that we're spiritually dead, then there must be another step in there. The Bible speaks of the Father drawing, calling, seeking, etc. Those are the terms that I think show that we are somehow, by God's grace, made able to respond to Him. I do also see Scripturally that man's will is involved too so it's not like we're saved without our knowledge. It meets somewhere in the middle and from my reading of Scripture, the "quickening" makes the most Biblical sense.
You are probably closer to our position than most of the Calvinists that I have talked to on this board. I am not a Calvinist, but I am not an Arminian either. I prefer to be labeled just as a non-Cal (or a Bible-believer, if you wish). The Arminian tag is an insult by the Calvinists because they know that we all believe in eternal security whereas the Arminians don't.
Anyway, Marcia is correct when she defined "dead" as
Being spiritually dead means being separated from God, and unreconciled to Him, not unable to respond.
That is the correct definition of death. It always means separation in the Bible. If the Calvinist could only understand this concept they would see that their arguments would fall apart. Separation from God does not mean without life, as they define it. It means that there must be a reconciliation. It means that there must be repentance. There is separation, and that separation must be reconciled. What does Paul say:
2 Corinthians 5:19-21 To wit, that God was in Christ, reconciling the world unto himself, not imputing their trespasses unto them; and hath committed unto us the word of reconciliation.
20 Now then we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God did beseech you by us: we pray you in Christ's stead, be ye reconciled to God.
21 For he hath made him to be sin for us, who knew no sin; that we might be made the righteousness of God in him.
Being an ambassador for Christ we have the obligation of bearing the name of Christ to all that are in the world, taking the gospel to them and giving them "the word of reconciliation" (the gospel).
We plead with people to be reconciled with God. That is our message to them. Why? They are dead, or separated from God--not lifeless.
The answer to this problem is found in Christ. It was Christ that was sinless, Christ that was made sin for us; took our sin upon himself; that we might be made righteous through him.
Death is separation, not lifelessness.
The part the Holy Spirit is indeed a quickening, which also can be defined as a convicting. He came to the world to convict of sin, of righteousness, and of judgement. "Of sin because they believe not on me," the Bible says. Thus the work of the Holy Spirit brings conviction through the Word of God in order that the sinner may believe. But the "belief" or faith does not come from God. It must be the sinner's choice whether to accept Christ or to reject him. That is the way it was on the Day of Pentecost. Some were saved and some were not. Many were convicted. But in spite of that conviction, not all that were convicted trusted Christ. Thus the grace of God in some was resisted--even as Stephen said it was.
Man does respond when he is spiritually separated (dead) from God. He has no other choice. We are made ambassadors for Christ to reconcile the spiritually dead (separated) to Christ. That is our mission on this earth.