Bad Advice Only

[Arbo]

Give the grandkids a box of crayons and a dollar and put them to work.


What do you do for a dog with gas? Please *ack * help!

 

[Gwyneth]

connect dog to gas fire , ecofriendly money saver.

how do I avoid the traffic light plague infesting this area........ ?

 

[Arbo]

Buy a magnetic red rotating light for your car.

I can't think of any questions for this thread. What do I do? (Well there's one.)

 

[Gwyneth]

I can't think of any questions for this thread. What do I do? (Well there's one.)

Take your thinking cap off.

How can I get up 2 hours earlier tomorrow :sleep:

 

[SaggyWoman]

How can I get up 2 hours earlier tomorrow :sleep:

Don't go to bed.



I need to go to the bathroom, but there isnt one close by.

 

[Benjamin]

I need to go to the bathroom, but there isnt one close by.

Got kitty litter?

Monday, I will be the first to take a practical test where we perform stretches, have the patient (our Professor) do exercises and document this. This test is said to be commonly the most failed test in the course, how should I approach this?

 

[Gwyneth]

Monday, I will be the first to take a practical test where we perform stretches, have the patient (our Professor) do exercises and document this. This test is said to be commonly the most failed test in the course, how should I approach this? __________________

loose your voice and wear plaster casts on both arms and legs.

I have to choose between going out for a meal and cooking for six guests , my husband wants me to dothe latter, how can I change his mind ?

 

[abcgrad94]

You go out to eat and let your husband cook for the guests. Problem solved!

How do I get my teenager to stop taking such long showers?

 

[jilphn1022]

Put the bathtub stopper in the drain.

 

[Gwyneth]

Put the bathtub stopper in the drain.

How can I get to understand the strange text language these youngsters use ?

 

[jilphn1022]

Oops, I goofed, thanks Gwyenth for keeping this thread moving,sorry!

Now for some bad advice, I would a Texas dictionary to be helpful.

What is the best way to remove stains from your carpet?

 

[padredurand]

What is the best way to remove stains from your carpet?

Permanently? Razor blade and a garbage bag. Cut out the stain and throw it away. :thumbsup:

The baby wants to watch Elmo. I want to watch NCIS. Suggestions?

 

[Scarlett O.]

Permanently? Razor blade and a garbage bag. Cut out the stain and throw it away. :thumbsup:

The baby wants to watch Elmo. I want to watch NCIS. Suggestions?

To be completely fair to you both, you should both go and help Madre fold clothes instead. :flower: :laugh:

My mop is worn-out and I need to mop today and don't have a new one, but don't want make a trip to town today just for a mop!

 

[jilphn1022]

I would use your best towel for a mop!

 

[Salty]

I would use your best towel for a mop!

My maid used my best towel to mop the floor, what should I tell the pastors wife when she needs to wash her hands?

 

[Gwyneth]

Tell her to use the curtains .
I need a cup of tea, but have no teabags what should I do ............

 

[jilphn1022]

Tell her to use the curtains .
I need a cup of tea, but have no teabags what should I do ............

I would take a small piece of tissue and shape it in a square and tape the side with some scotch tape and mark the paper square with the letter "T".
Then dip the paper square in a teacup add hot boiling water. Presto "T" time!
Oops! I forgot to mention to remove the "T" bag when it is strong enough to your taste!
Enjoy!

How can I get my hubby to fix our stopped-up sink?

 

[Gwyneth]

How can I get my hubby to fix our stopped-up sink?

Pile the washing up in the bathtub.

How can I get my husband to put his towel on the towel rail and not on the side of the bath ?

 

[Benjamin]

How can I get my husband to put his towel on the towel rail and not on the side of the bath ?

Tell him you want him to have a towel bar mounted on the side of the bath by this weekend.

My wife just texted that she is 5 minutes away from returning from her trip. How can I get the house clean in such a short time?

 

[Old Union Brother]

My wife just texted that she is 5 minutes away from returning from her trip. How can I get the house clean in such a short time?

Tell her you'll meet her at the slowest restaurant in town and call a cleaning service.

I have a one eyed dog, two psychotic cats and an overweight rabbit what should I do with them?