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Bad Advice Only

Sorry ... you're going to have to explain that one ... and there ain't no "advice" in it, bad, good or otherwise.Leave 15 minutes early, padlock the front, back, side, and cellar doors, plus all the windows, from the outside, and go preach like you always do. Explain later it was fluke accident that she got "stuck" in the house.

Keyboard for some reason keeps typing "form" instead of "from" ...

Go to your optomitrist(sp?) and slug him....bad glasses......


Tiller won't till in a straight line....like a bishop in chess, only moves diagonally(sp?)...
 
Tiller won't till in a straight line....like a bishop in chess, only moves diagonally(sp?)...
Disabuse yourself of this evil Satanic machine -- I am convinced from <--- (had to hit "backspace" three times to "get the keyboard" to spell that right!) ...

... personal experience that tillers and aerators are possessed. And that opinion is beginning to envelop keyboards as well.

Royals-Rays Game 2 tonight. Wife wants to watch "Rizzoli and Isles" instead. Hm ...
 

Salty

20,000 Posts Club
Administrator
How do we get Dr Bob to wear a bowtie and then post a picture with it.
 
My bath tub's leaking....
Calculate the exact point directly below the tub and install a metal basin with adequate drainage. Continue to let the tub leak until it weakens the floor to the point it falls through into the metal basin, then build a new bathroom around it.

Every Wednesday when the lawn is being watered, the newspaper carrier throws the paper right on top of the sprinkler head next to the driveway in the front yard ...
 

Salty

20,000 Posts Club
Administrator

Every Wednesday when the lawn is being watered, the newspaper carrier throws the paper right on top of the sprinkler head next to the driveway in the front yard ...

Swap you paper with the next door neighbor



I want to be in a church trio - but everyone says I cant sing....
 

Salty

20,000 Posts Club
Administrator
Good, now you have an excuse to close that illegal unlicensed dental practice.

Driving to Minnesota to get roof estimates for my elderly father-in-law and having trouble deciding whether to stop for the night in the teeming metropolises of Albert Lea or Owatonna ...

Don't you mean - stopping for the Light in the teeming metropolises.....

If you see a police car at the donut shop - you will be fine.



Should I have my mail delivered to my house or should I get a PO Box?
 
Don't you mean - stopping for the Light in the teeming metropolises.....
Actually, Owatonna has a pretty nice little Super 8. :laugh:
If you see a police car at the donut shop - you will be fine.
Found it. He told me about the Super 8 :laugh:
Should I have my mail delivered to my house or should I get a PO Box?
Neither. Pay the postmaster to put your mail on microfiche, pay for the machine necessary to do so as well as a microfiche reader/writer for yourself, and buy carrier pigeons. The rest should be obvious.
 
Anutter brain gas attack, eh?
Well, technically this time it was because the hotel wi-fi conection was iffy, and the one I stayed at in Lakes country didn't even have wi-fi. People go up there to fish and boat. What the heck they need wi-fi for? Unless of course, they're there to take roof bids for their father-in-law and could really use access to some roofers' web sites!!
What do you need bad advice for?
To compare good advice to so I'll know how to recognize it? :laugh:
That Mizzou education has done wonders for you....:tongue3:
I never claimed it was going to help my memory at this age. I'm considering myself blessed to be able to remember my research work from the time I do it to the time I record it. :BangHead:

I'm not even sure I'm worrying about whether or not it proves my thesis at this point, as long as I remember and record it! :laugh:

Now ... After a 1400+-mile round trip in a truck in just over 55 hours, I'm tired. What do I do about not falling asleep in church or Sunday school?
 
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Salty

20,000 Posts Club
Administrator


Now ... After a 1400+-mile round trip in a truck in just over 55 hours, I'm tired. What do I do about not falling asleep in church or Sunday school?

Bring a pillow with you, so when your head hits the table, there wont be a loud noise.



My wife thinks I should bring home half of my dinner from the restaurant. How can I convince here I should it all at the restaurant.
 
My wife thinks I should bring home half of my dinner from the restaurant. How can I convince here I should it all at the restaurant.
Convince her? Just tell her, "Woman, I'm eating it all right here and now!"

We have a spare bedroom ...

BTW, no tables ... pews in the sanctuary, folding chairs in Sunday school. I survived, but I took the pillow just in case I could make myself go sideways.

The sprinklers ran early this morning, then the rain caught up with me from Minnesota, and the law needs to be mowed. How to dry the grass out quickly?
 
The sprinklers ran early this morning, then the rain caught up with me from Minnesota, and the law needs to be mowed. How to dry the grass out quickly?


You're a baptist and have the audacity to ask a question as simple as this? :confused: Just go outside and talk to it...with your hot air, it'll dry in less than 1 hour....


Lawnmower won't start and the sparkplug broke off inside the motor....
 
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