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Church membership question

evangelist6589

evangelist6589

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I made a mistake joining a church where I do not agree in most areas. I am involved in men's discipleship at another church 2 days a week, however due to my family nature cannot attend that church on Sundays. Would a elder board or a pastor approve me as a member given that I cannot attend? Elders at the church do understand my family situation and have themselves advised me to keep the peace and not to go to a different church as my wife.

I have never done anything like this before so I am not sure if it would work but if it did it would make me happy as I no longer would be under the authority of an IFB church. IFB churches and 9 Marks Churches are very differnt so they would not consider one another a church of like faith and practice. Thanks..
 
evangelist6589

evangelist6589

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Revmitchell said:
Maybe it is you who needs to change and not everyone else around you.
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Can you answer the questions I posed and not turn this into a personal attack on me? Look I'd rather be in a like minded church and under their authority but I cannot attend the other church on sundays. Would they approve me as a member given the situation?
 
R

Revmitchell

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It was not a personal attack it was straight out good counsel. Look we have a member who has not been able to post due to health reasons named Tom. He is a Calvinist and never posted with arrogance or superiority. He attends a Baptist church where the Pastor and some of the other leadership are not Calvinists. He knows that there will be some things preached and taught that he disagrees with and yet he never feels he needs to confront or get in the face of anyone. He serves and worships the Lord there in that church with the peace and calling of God and always works to maintain unity first.

You have a zeal but no judgment. That is not meant as an attack it is just a statement of fact. You should be able to serve and worship God right there beside your family in peace and unity. Pray, disciple, and love your family and that church. You start doing that first and you will see God move in your life and in the lives around you in a way that you would never want to change.
 
evangelist6589

evangelist6589

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Revmitchell said:
It was not a personal attack it was straight out good counsel. Look we have a member who has not been able to post due to health reasons named Tom. He is a Calvinist and never posted with arrogance or superiority. He attends a Baptist church where the Pastor and some of the other leadership are not Calvinists. He knows that there will be some things preached and taught that he disagrees with and yet he never feels he needs to confront or get in the face of anyone. He serves and worships the Lord there in that church with the peace and calling of God and always works to maintain unity first.

You have a zeal but no judgment. That is not meant as an attack it is just a statement of fact. You should be able to serve and worship God right there beside your family in peace and unity. Pray, disciple, and love your family and that church. You start doing that first and you will see God move in your life and in the lives around you in a way that you would never want to change.
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Imagine this. God moved you out of your church and into a church where you disagree. Hmm lets say RC Sproul or Mac's church. How would you do? Would you not be looking for every opportunity to get out and to be in a church where you are like minded?

Or imagine this one. God moved you into a church where Paul Washer is the pastor. How would you do?
 
R

Revmitchell

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evangelist6589 said:
Imagine this. God moved you out of your church and into a church where you disagree. Hmm lets say RC Sproul or Mac's church. How would you do? Would you not be looking for every opportunity to get out and to be in a church where you are like minded?

Or imagine this one. God moved you into a church where Paul Washer is the pastor. How would you do?
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If God moved me there then I would do as God wanted. How about you?
 
R

Revmitchell

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evangelist6589 said:
So you would suddenly agree with Calvinism and other doctrines where you disagree?
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The answer is no but you need to ask the right question.

The right question is how should I handle being in this circumstance God has put me in?

The answer is more silence than talking. The answer is patience and prayer not confrontation. The answer is be a loving influence rather than an "in your face" annoyance. These people are not your enemy. Stop treating them like they are. Love them no matter what. Be at peace with them in all situations. Serve God right there faithfully and in unity with that local assembly. You have some areas of growth that needs work and the situation you are in appears to be the tool God wants to use in your life to obtain that growth. When God is done with you there He will move you. You keep trying to get ahead of God and life will only be miserable.
 
blessedwife318

blessedwife318

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I don't see why a church would accept someone who will not come on Sundays. Sundays is the main day for worship at most churches. Illness, jobs, traveling are one thing when it comes to missing an occasional Sunday here and there, but every Sunday is a problem.
Here is the thing. You made the willing choice to join your wife's church. You knew what their stand was before signing on the dotted line. By sowing division you have been violating what the Bible say about how to act in a church.
Heb 13:17 Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to you.
 
Jerome

Jerome

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InTheLight

InTheLight

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JonShaff said:
What are the disagreements over?
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Evan6589 joined his wife's church. They are not Calvinists. They are KJVO and total abstainers of alcohol. According to Evan they don't do evangelism properly since they don't preach repentance enough and don't use the Way of the Master methodologies. I think they don't do contemporary music either. These are all sore points with Evan.

Sent from my Motorola Droid Turbo using Tapatalk.
 
Salty

Salty

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1) Me thinks his wife should follow her husband
2) every Baptist church is an independent Baptist church
3) and what is: a 9 Marks Churches
 
blessedwife318

blessedwife318

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Salty said:
1) Me thinks his wife should follow her husband
2) every Baptist church is an independent Baptist church
3) and what is: a 9 Marks Churches
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1. So far Evan has refused to step up and take the Spiritual Leadership in his home.
2. True
3. Its churches that follow the 9 Mark of a healthy Church according to Mark Dever which are:
  1. Expositional preaching
  2. Biblical theology
  3. Biblical understanding of the Gospel
  4. Biblical understanding of conversion
  5. Biblical understanding of evangelism
  6. Biblical understanding of membership
  7. Biblical church discipline
  8. Promotion of Christian discipleship and growth
  9. Biblical understanding of church leadership[8]
My husband and I actually found the church we are going to on 9marks site so we are a fan.
 
A

Aaron

Member
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evangelist6589 said:
I made a mistake joining a church where I do not agree in most areas. I am involved in men's discipleship at another church 2 days a week, however due to my family nature cannot attend that church on Sundays. Would a elder board or a pastor approve me as a member given that I cannot attend? Elders at the church do understand my family situation and have themselves advised me to keep the peace and not to go to a different church as my wife.

I have never done anything like this before so I am not sure if it would work but if it did it would make me happy as I no longer would be under the authority of an IFB church. IFB churches and 9 Marks Churches are very differnt so they would not consider one another a church of like faith and practice. Thanks..
Click to expand...
You were warned.

Taxonomy of Fundamentalism (IFB)
 
D

Don

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John - when you asked people on this board about your fiancee, you were given a LOT of advice to not marry. When you asked about other things, you were given advice that didn't agree with what you preferred to do.

Why do you think anyone's going to give you advice that says yes, those people will allow you to become a "part-time" member of their church?

By the way: the answer is no. The explanation is, if YOU were the pastor, would you accept a person asking to be a part-time member?

Give it some thought. It's time to make a decision. No more wishy-washy trying to have it both ways. Just remember: you chose your wife, knowing full well the differences, and knowing full well the importance of the biblical relationship between husband and wife. Careful with your choice.
 
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