I agree - the saved are all of those who God effectually calls. I wouldn't say that the "general call" is an unsuccessful attempt to save all (no more than the Law was an unsuccessful attempt of redemption). The general call is, I believe, God telling the world that salvation is here, that He is faithful to His word and if any turn to Him in repentance He will be faithful to forgive their sins. This is love, and it is a legitimate offer of salvation. At the same time I believe that this "sets the stage" for God's recreation of mankind in Christ Jesus. The Father gives the sheep to the Son, and the Son loses none whom the Father gives. The difference here is that some believe the sheep were always sheep. To use an illustration about the Judgment, I believe that I was once a goat but God worked supernaturally in me so that I am a new creature (I don't think we can refer to the lost as a sheep until he is found, or elect until he is saved).
But if you talk about, to borrow again from Spurgeon, God's "choice portion" then it is His people. And yes, God loves the Church in a way that God does not love the World.
There are no "totally uncalled".
I believe that God chose not to choose everyone.Those God did not save He still created and I believe for a purpose. I think that God created the "vessels of wrath" for His own glory. While we may find it difficult to understand now, I think that we can accept this now and understand later. Personally, I don't have the same barrier (not seeing the logic).
If I love God then I hate sin. Is not my hate for sin an expression of my love for God? If a man loves his wife then he opposes anything that would harm her. Is not this negative (opposing things/people that would harm his wife) an expression of the positive (a man's love for his wife)? If God loves lost people so that he saves some, is not God's rightful judgment against those who remain opposed to Him (the reprobate) not an expression of God's love and is this not an expression of God's own glory? I believe so. But I understand this can be a philosophical argument and people disagree.