Hi Glad4Mercy,
You said, "You did not mention that resistible vs irresistible grace. If you believe in resistible grace, that will make you a three point Arminian, if you believe in irresistible grace, you are a two point Calvinist."
Irresistible Grace is a necessary corollary of Total Spiritual Inability. The Calvinist view is that the Fall resulted in mankind being conceived in a state where they are unable to seek God or respond appropriately to the gospel. To overcome this supposed spiritual condition, each person must be altered by irresistible grace and compelled to "willingly" believe.
However, scripture teaches we are conceived with "limited" spiritual ability, we can, in the fallen state, understand spiritual milk, but are unable to understand spiritual meat.
Therefore, according to my understanding, we can respond to God's revelatory grace, such as the 2,3 and 4th soils of Matthew 13. The first soil was not conceived unable to respond due to the Fall, but became unable through the practice of sin. God's revelatory grace is resistible, we can leave it, or take it to varying degrees.
But to your point, I believe the fallen choose life or death, and thus I believe we are not compelled to life or to death. Since I believe in Limited Spiritual Ability, from conception, I see no need for the Arminian Prevenient Grace. So by my count I am back to a 2 pointer.