To me you're looking at this like a debate, in which I have to convince people who don't see the Bible as I do, to see it the way I do.
I'm not really here, in this section, for that, although I have been trying to.
I'm here to declare the truth of Scripture, and let the chips fall where they may.
For example:
" And when the Gentiles heard this, they were glad, and glorified the word of the Lord: and as many as were ordained to eternal life believed." ( Acts 13:8 ) <------- Here we see that as many as were ordained to eternal life, believed. Ordination precedes belief.
" But ye believe not, because ye are not of my sheep, as I said unto you." ( John 10:26 ) <------ Here we see Jesus telling the Jews that did not believe on Him, why they did not...because one has to be a sheep in order to believe. Being a sheep precedes belief.
" Then said they unto him, What shall we do, that we might work the works of God?
29 Jesus answered and said unto them, This is the work of God, that ye believe on him whom he hath sent.
30 They said therefore unto him, What sign shewest thou then, that we may see, and believe thee? what dost thou work?" ( John 6:18-30 ) <------ Here we see Jesus answering the Jews "out of left field" ( because He is answering them spiritually, instead of carnally, so it only looks like it is from out in left field ) and telling them that it is a work of God to believe on Him. Therefore, it is not a work of men to do so. God's work precedes belief.
" But there are some of you that believe not. For Jesus knew from the beginning who they were that believed not, and who should betray him.
65 And he said, Therefore said I unto you, that no man can come unto me, except it were given unto him of my Father." ( John 6:64-65 ) <------ Here we see Jesus declaring that there were some in the crowd that did not believe. He then tells them why they did not...because it has to be given to a person by His Father, in order to come to Him in belief. God the Father's giving of a person to Christ precedes belief.
" So then faith [cometh] by hearing, and hearing by the word of God." ( Romans 10:17 ) <------ Here we see the word of God preceding faith.
" For unto you it is given in the behalf of Christ, not only to believe on him, but also to suffer for his sake;" ( Philippians 1:29 ) <------ Here we see two things that are given ( making them gifts ) to believers; To believe on Him, and to suffer for His sake. The giving of the two precedes belief.
" He came unto his own, and his own received him not.
12 But as many as received him, to them gave he power to become the sons of God, [even] to them that believe on his name:
13 which were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of God." ( John 1:11-13 ) <------ Here we see that Jesus came to His own ( the Jews ), but they did not receive ( welcome ) Him. But as many as received ( welcomed ) Him, to them gave He the power to become ( resemble ) the sons of God ( "become" is Late Middle English for "assume the qualities of", or "resemble", or, more accurately, "begin to be" / "come to be").
What we also see, is this little fact that most who read this passage seem to overlook, because they are often looking at verse 12 to the exclusion of 13: Becoming born again is not by blood ( inheritance ), nor of the will of the flesh ( our own will ), nor of the will of man ( other people's will ), but it is of God.
People are born again "of God", or "by / from" God.
Therefore, man's will is completely ruled out by verse 13...but in every church I've ever been in, no pastor has ever read past verse 12.
Finally ( I love this verse and it is very special to me, because it shows me the love my Saviour has for me ),
" Blessed [is the man whom] thou choosest, and causest to approach [unto thee], that he may dwell in thy courts: we shall be satisfied with the goodness of thy house, even of thy holy temple." ( Psalms 65:4 ) <------- Here we see God choosing someone, and causing that person to approach Him. This was revealed to David, a man after God's own heart.
Those are a few samples of what I see and why.
To me, this was never about "Calvinism" versus "Arminianism", it was always about one person seeing what they see, and explaining to someone why they see it that way.
I'm at my limit...
Time to wait on God and see what happens, either way.