Not attending all services

I am not condemning her. I said that she should not let anyone put her on a guilt trip for it. I am not calling her to neglect her duties at home.

 

I did not say you were. It was just a general statement. I have been (and still am) in a similar situation and have had people condemn me for it.

 

Take care of your home. Attending church "every time the doors are open" may stroke some egos, but it is not required of a believer.

 

Define missing church. If she goes Sunday morning, why is anyone making her feel guilty or judging her for not going Sunday night?

Her situation at home requires different things from her than it does for others. Where's her church family in all of this? Why don't they assist her with house cleaning, etc.?

Personally, if I were looking for a church to attend, I would find one that doesn't condemn people for not going on Sunday night, or I would find a church that doesn't have a Sunday night service.

 

Why is that, Paul?

By what criteria do we judge when we have fellowshipped enough with God's people, worshipped enough in Christ's body, and learned enough from the corporate teaching of God's word?

(Mind you, I am not being judgmental of you or anyone else. My point is to probe your reasoning for such a statement, and the reasoning of anyone else who cares to contribute.)

How does one decide when they have attended church enough for a given week?

 

Every time God's people meet together, God promised to be there in the midst of them. Every time God's people meet together, God wants to help us grow in faith and knowledge of Him.

Consider the Sunday evening service that Thomas missed. I ask you, did he miss a blessing that night? Did he miss an opportunity to have his faith strengthened?

John 20:19 Then the same day at evening, being the first day of the week, when the doors were shut where the disciples were assembled for fear of the Jews, came Jesus and stood in the midst, and saith unto them, Peace be unto you.
20 And when he had so said, he shewed unto them his hands and his side. Then were the disciples glad, when they saw the Lord.

John 20:24 But Thomas, one of the twelve, called Didymus, was not with them when Jesus came.

 

Pastor Larry,

I'm certainly not able to make a decision for everyone on how much "church" is enough. I will only state why I lead a group of people to live out their faith with a gathering on Sunday mornings and small groups throughout the week.

1. Church is not a place you go. It is people who are. So I am not limiting church whatsoever. I am expanding church. Live it out in your community and with your friends.

2. I think going to a building on Sunday morning and then going home and returning to do basically the same thing again is ineffective.


3. I cannot preach 3 or 4 sermons every week. And quite honestly nobody can. When you consider the great communicators of our day spend 25 hours a week preparing for a sermon (Media Shout;Video Clips; Object Lessons; Graphics; On the street interviews etc.), and the average pastor preaching 3 or 4 times a week prepares 1-3 hours for his Wednesday night talk. People might not be coming back because it isn't worth their time not because they aren't spiritual. And frankly all to often it isn't. And I think if you as a pastors have to constantly "bash" people to be in church you are taking the easy way out. People will come if it makes a difference in their lives. Do the work. Preach the word effectively and creatively and people will be there. YOu just can't physically and spiritually do it well 3-5 times a week.

So I DON'T!!

4. There are many things that a sermon and a song can't teach about the Christian life that small groups and community life can. It is a more well-rounded out way to grow in your faith.

5. We have put together a 33 week Bible study program that takes people from the basics of their faith to sharing their faith. 6 weeks on the basics. 6 weeks on the basic spiritual disciplines. 3 weeks on discovering your SHAPE and getting plugged into ministry. 10 weeks on handling finances. 8 weeks on sharing your faith. I'd much rather have people in small groups throughout the week growing in their faith in that arena and with courses specifically designed to get them going on their spiritual journey then hearing their 4'th random sermon sitting in rows.

Just my thoughts.

 

Pastor Bob,

To take John 20:19 and use it as a proof text for Sunday evening service as we know them in 21'st Century America is a real stretch. They were not even in a church building as they were gathered in a home.

That type of mis-use of Scripture to manipulate people will not fill the "church house" long term.

I don't mean that in a disrespectful manner.

 

Ah, but Pastor Bob, where is the condemnation in the scripture for Thomas' abscence? There is none that I can find AND Christ made a special trip to see him.

We have a loving Saviour who meets us where we are!

Far to many judge other's spiritual condition by the amount of time spent in church instead of by the fruit of the Spirit. "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long-suffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law." Gal 5:22-23

Church attendance is not listed! We are encourage to fellowship one with another, but it is left up to us to decide when and how much. If you get the fruit part down, the fellowshipping part will take care of itself.

This lady has a husband who's wishes must be considered before she can consider church attendence. If he wants the house clean and some of her time, it isn't unreasonable of him to expect this of her within the context of what time she has left over after she does her outside job. It is not wrong of her to split her off time up between home and church, nor to decide how much time gets spent where.

If the sitter was saying these things in front of my six year old daughter and thus undermining my spiritual authority over my own child, I'd be considering a new sitter.

 

I do not think that the "building" is even a question in this thread. The fact is, when the "church" meets together, God promised to be there in the midst of them. Matthew 18:20

When God's people are meeting together, where ever that might be, Christians should have a desire to meet together with them and so receive a blessing and strengthen their faith.

I maintain that my use of this passage was rightly dividing the Word. Thomas missed an opportunity to gather with the other disciples. As a result, he missed an opportunity to meet face-to-face with the Lord Jesus. He mssied the intial out pouring of the Holy Spirit. Is there any doubt that if he had been there he would have believed and had his faith strengthened?

I do not attempt to "manipulate" my people. My people come to hear the Word of God proclaimed and to fellowship with other believers. Our Sunday evening service is the favorite service of the overwhelming majority of our folk. We are not bound to the clock like we are Sunday morning because of bus routes and children's Church. We have quite a bit more singing and testimonies on Sunday night. There is no "manipulation" involved; those who love the Lord and love the Church will be there if at all possible.

We have an elderly couple in our church. He is 86 and she is 85. This man has to physically pick his wife up and put her in the car and then physically pick her up, put her in her wheelchair and roll her up next to their favorite pew (fifth from the front - right side) and then do it all again Sunday night and Wednesday night.

I have pleaded with this man to let me video the services and bring them over for them to watch in the comfort of their home. He refuses and answers each time, "As long as we're able to be here, we'll be here."

I assure you it is not because I am a great preacher or because I have "manipulated" them by making them feel guilty if they miss. Simply put, they love this church and all it stands for and they have a very strong desire to be here every time the doors are opened.

All I can say is, "Praise the Lord for faithful folks like these."

 

Hebrews 10
23 Let us hold fast the profession of our faith without wavering; (for he is faithful that promised
24 And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works:
25 Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching.

If your not present at the assembly of the body, you cannot be exhorted or provoked to love and good works by the other members. As the day approaches, we need this exhorting and provoking more and more. This is one of the ways God has ordained for us to stay watchful and keep our lamps filled.

 

This is a sad Laodicean attitude toward the preaching of God's word. It is not multimedia that convicts people and changes them into the image of Christ. You would do better to stand up and just read the bible straight 3 times a week than waste all that time putting together broadcast quality video clips and multimedia presentations. The 'great communicators of our day' have nothing on the great communicators of days past.

 

newlady3203 I want you to know that I, or for that matter no one else was attacking you personally. Your situation may very well merit you staying home from church. I have no problem with that whatsoever. I am refuting the philosophy that church attendance is not important or that it is no indication of our walk with the Lord. I maintain that it is. Unless one is providentially hindered from being at "church," I believe they ought to be there.

Too many people "lay out of church" for no other reason than for convenience sake. Too many people have the gross misconception that "once a week is all I need" when it comes to church.

Again, please know that my comments were directed at an issue and not at you directly.

If you'll PM me with your husband's name, I'll be happy to add him to my personal and our church's prayer list.

 

Newlady, I don't want you to think anyone is condemning your decision not to attend every service. We all have to make these decisions based on our own circumstances and our own understanding of the word. As for the huge debate, well, these are the debate forums. Thats what we do . God bless you for sticking by your husband and doing what you must in a not-so-ideal situation.

 

NewLady, my family attends everything on Sunday morning (hubby attends both morning services) and we teach Sunday School. We also work with the children on Sunday afternoon during the school year in a discipleship class and Wednesday nights (AWANA) during the school year. We do NOT usually attend worship on Sunday night. Our Sunday night service is aimed at the youth and the very young and doesn't feel like church to us.

Hubby, age 58, works 12 - 14 hour days minimum and every Sat. until 3 or 4 p.m. with his FIRST job. He also works a part time job on call. Sunday night is our only family time.

I do NOT feel guilty about missing one service.

BTW... my husband has Multiple Sclerosis, Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease, Asthma, Rheumatoid Arthritis, High Blood Pressure and cannot urinate. For about 13 or more years, he has had to catherize himself to urinate. He works all those hours with all those conditions and has never complained. He had double pneumonia a few weeks ago and missed ONE DAY of work, a Friday.

 

I think these man-made traditions of guilting folks for not going to mass every time your church has one as a false display of peity is something we should separate from.

 

No one here is talking about mass. Why are you?

 

If we were talking about Catholics guilting other Catholics to attend every mass, how would that change your view on this?