The Bible teaches that God is sovereign and in His sovereignty He decided that man will choose to either respond to the gospel and receive it or reject it.
I see nowhere in all of the Bible that it is described that way.
But I do see how, in a few places and isolated from much of the rest of what the Lord has to say, that it could work that way.
Let me ask you, do you also accuse the receiver of a birthday gift of being at least partly responsible for giving himself the birthday gift simply because he reached out and took it from the giver and took possession of it?
As in other threads where this was discussed, Mark:
In what I have come to understand as your view, the gift is
actively received
by the act of accepting it.
Therefore, God is offering it with the express intent of attaching
a condition to it in order for us as men to get it from Him.
He then bases His salvation of an individual on what the individual
does ( reaches out and accepts it ) and
possesses ( the wisdom, strength, or will to accept it ), thereby making Him a respecter of persons... and not on His own totally-uninfluenced-by-the-decisions-of-men choice to grant mercy and compassion on someone strictly because of His kindness.
Of course you know where I stand and I do not view salvation as a reward, which is how I see you describing it;
I view it as a gift that is given with no strings attached and is passively received because of God giving it to one, and withholding it from another based on His mercy and grace alone, and on nothing that we do, say, or desire.
Please see Romans 9:6-24.
That said:
Not to reply for him ( which I cannot ), but, yes,
I would say ( if asked ) that if the term "gift" as seen in Romans 6:23, for example, is defined in the "active" way, then the person
is responsible for giving it to himself or herself...
Primarily
because they performed an act that, in reality, functions as merit to gain it... instead of them having it dropped into their laps, totally unexpected and fully
without merit.
Election as described in Romans 8:28-30, Romans 9, Ephesians 1:3-6, Ephesians 2:8-10, 2 Thessalonians 2:13-14, Psalms 65:4, John 6:37-47, John 6:64-65, John 17:2 and many other places, is the only thing that I see that completely bypasses merit and preserves Romans 11:5-6, Romans 4:4 and Ephesians 2:9...
and
truly defines salvation and eternal life as
gifts.
May God, in His grace, bless you with many of them.