I think that we also need to keep in mind that ideologies and worldviews have changed. People in the middle of a narrative never fully appreciate the narrative in which they live.
Abortion is a horrible evil. But being soaked in the blood of our children I do not think that we can truly recognize the magnitude of the evil. The same goes for slavery. George Washington owned slaves. He was a man of faith and intelligence. But when a slave escaped he initiation because he thought she may have been kidnapped. He could not understand why she would desire to leave.
We cannot judge the past. We can learn from history and identify evils, accomplishments, and failures. Hopefully we can learn form the past, but we cannot pass judgment over it. They say hindsight is 20/20, but it is not really because living in the present is also to live in a unique narrative.
I don't think we're disagreeing but rather talking about something entirely different, at least at certain points.
Reparations are all about judging the past. We can take your tack and unilaterally say end of discussion, which leads to the bootstrap approach Or we can talk about the past in relation to the present. What we cannot do is refuse to talk about the past yet pretend to do so, or unilaterally demand we ignore it, in talking about the present. That leads to an automatic end of discussion. Again, back to the bootstrap approach.
Quite frankly, the bootstrap approach is what a great many blacks have maintained, or at least its façade. Their HBCU would be an example. They want your money, just not your influence. We see it also in their demands for additional separate graduation ceremonies.