Bad Advice Only

[SaggyWoman]

I`m so cold what must I do ?

Build a fire in your kitchen.


I should be off, but my relief has not come. What should I do?

 

[Salty]

I should be off, but my relief has not come. What should I do?

Call the Fire Dept, tell them you are burnt up at your often late relief.


Its 1105 pm, must be up at 130 am to go to work. Should I go to bed or what

 

[Gwyneth]

Go to bed and set your alarm for 2.00am

my neighbours` dog is barking, and I can`t sleep, how can I stop it from making such a racket.

 

[Arbo]

Turn the hose on it. (It's what I really do when the neighbor's dog won't shut up.:smilewinkgrin

I owe income taxes but don't want to pay. What do I do?

 

[SaggyWoman]

I owe income taxes but don't want to pay. What do I do?

Send them $100 in pennies.


My lips are chapped. What should I do?

 

[Salty]

My lips are chapped. What should I do?

Glue them together.


Mrs Salty are going to a V-Day dinner tonight, but it is snowing and Mrs Salty may be afraid to go.

PS its an ABC church, would that make a difference?

 

[Arbo]

Glue them together.


Mrs Salty are going to a V-Day dinner tonight, but it is snowing and Mrs Salty may be afraid to go.

PS its an ABC church, would that make a difference?

Take her out dancing instead.


My dog ate my doctoral thesis. What do I do?

 

[SaggyWoman]

.


My dog ate my doctoral thesis. What do I do?

Copy some work of Martin Luther and turn it in.



I don't want to go to church tomorrow, but I gotta. What should I do?

 

[Salty]

I don't want to go to church tomorrow, but I gotta. What should I do?

Just tell folks you are Seventh Day Baptist and you are all set for the week (just make sure there is a church near your)


What do we do if the Admins want to shut down this thread?

 

[Gwyneth]

Start a BIG argument and call each other names.

I need to get some bread and the shop is closed how can I deal with this ?

 

[Salty]

I need to get some bread and the shop is closed how can I deal with this ?

Get your weat seeds out of the closet - plant them...


How can I eat extra food when Mrs. Salty has me on a diet

 

[SaggyWoman]

Go over to your girlfriend's house and eat.


The sky is falling. What should I do>

 

[jilphn1022]

Run as fast as you can to find Chicken Little!

 

[Gwyneth]

Run as fast as you can to find Chicken Little!

I have found Chicken Little ......... what shall I do with her ?

 

[jilphn1022]

My advice to you would be to see if Chicken Little is hen-pecking her hubby!

 

[jilphn1022]

My advice to you would be to see if Chicken Little is hen-pecking her hubby!

What should we do with Chicken Little if she is guilty of hen-pecking Mr. Little?

 

[Gwyneth]

sage and onion, I think :laugh:.

how could I persuade my husband that he needs to clear the garage ?

 

[padredurand]

sage and onion, I think :laugh:.

how could I persuade my husband that he needs to clear the garage ?

Let him buy a truck and a bass boat. One of them has to go inside.

Speaking of bass boats.... I want to get one and name it Visitation. Then if someone calls madre can say, "Pastor isn't here. He's out on Visitation." Will it work?

 

[SaggyWoman]

Speaking of bass boats.... I want to get one and name it Visitation. Then if someone calls madre can say, "Pastor isn't here. He's out on Visitation." Will it work?

It could. Like the golfing pastor ministering to the Greens.

It is time to feed the baby. What should I do.

 

[Gwyneth]

It is time to feed the baby. What should I do

Get a takeaway meal for him /her.


My printer has `died` I have reports to print, and all the shops are closed,how can I get this printing done ?