Featured I'm taking the spiritual lead in my family

It sounds like she's just going to be IFB unless God leads her in another direction. If you try to force her to change, I guarantee she'll end up just resenting you.

I can understand the desire to escape an IFB environment. I would rather change denominations than attend an IFB church. That being said, you're in a difficult situation.

Do you feel like your conscience is violated by attending the IFB, or does the church just annoy or irritate you? There's a big difference. If you believe it is wrong to attend that church, you should not attend it. If it's a preference issue, all I can say is to commit the issue to prayer.

But whatever you do---do not force her. Spiritual leadership is not forcing another person against their conscience. You don't have the biblical authority to do that because it would be forcing a person to sin, which is always wrong.

 

That would appear the short-term outcome. Most importantly, make sure that you do not become lax spiritually. If you do, it will confirm any possible biases against your preferred church. Be honest with your wife that you feel like your conscience will not permit you to continue attending the church.

The alcohol reason isn't that big of a deal, IMO, but your inability to give to the church is key. If you can't in good conscience give to a church, you don't belong there.

Hopefully, she will come around in time.

 

I am a member of an SBC church for a reason. I'm not KJVO or KJVP, and there are a host of other IFB cultural and church practice issues that I cannot accept.

I would likely attend a non-denominational or Bible church. They are similar but not actually Baptist.

That would not require abandoning the fundamentals of the faith, either.

 

Sure, de facto Baptist vs. officially Baptist is perhaps a distinction without a difference.

That being said, if my only options were an IFB church and a PCA church, I'd likely pick the PCA church. I would have disagreements with both, but I could attend a church that practices paedobaptism, in some cases. I'd rather not, but in my mind IFB represents a separate category of Baptist that I simply cannot abide. It's a matter of conscience.

IMO, it's a matter of evangelicalism more than Baptist in terms of doctrine. I'm Baptist in belief, but I could attend other denominational churches, if I had no other options. And I don't consider IFB an option.

 

I hear you Tom, but I'm also an old man (with folly of my own).

 

I agree regarding the alcohol, but I can't be so sure about the rest. I know that to be a member of an IFB church would violate my conscience, so I can understand how it could be challenging for others.

But if he can at all make the IFB church work, he should. He can always pray for God to change his wife's mind on the matter.