If there is a church member who is lead by the Lord to be at your service (and as a pastor I would think you could tell the difference) and all of the sudden, he or she does not show up, I think it is appropriate to call them immediately to find out if they are ok and tell them you missed their presence.
That has NOTHING to do with using the telephone, verbal messages, gimics such as High Attendence day, food, recreation as tools to maintain church attendence, as tools for church growth, or as the basis of your ministry. I answered your question quite clearly.
This seems to be the first time you answered my question when you said "immediately."
But now you raise more questions: How would I (as a pastor) know if there is a church member led of the Lord to be at the service? How would I judge that, as opposed to the members who are not led of the Lord to be at a service?
You say that the telephone should not be used, or verbal messages. How else should we communicate with these members?
I agree that many gimmicks are inappropriate. I don't think everything you list is a gimmick. I think things such as dinners, special days, can be used to gain contacts for the church, to be a presence in a community. I see nothing wrong with that provided it is done under the biblical commands and philosophy. We have a Family Christmas Dinner every year that is a time to fellowship and we encourage people to invite family and friends. We have a program of music and a short message about Christ and Christmas and salvation. We are having a Mother Daughter Tea in a couple of weeks that will be a similar type function. We consider these are introductory events, a chance to make contact with people.
Here is what seems strange to me, ironic even: You seem to think it is wrong for a church to have food, high attendance days, recreation (even though there is no biblical command forbidding it) and you think it is okay for a member to not assemble with the church (even though there is a biblical command forbidding it). In other words, your forbid what the Bible does not while allowing that which the Bible forbids. Isn't that ironic?
Getting back to the first paragraph, if that person you just called does not come back after your first call, (and I am assuming a regular attender), lets throw the question back at you. How many times are you going to call before it ceases to be a call of concern and takes on the characteristics of taking the place of the leading of the Lord? That is my question and I hope you will answer it this time.
I did not see this question before. The answer is, It all depends on a number of factors. Here, if a member does not attend church for 13 consecutive weeks, they are placed on an inactive list. If they do not resume attendance by the end of the year, they are removed from membership at the next annual congregational meeting.
The Lord does not lead people to drop out of the church or to be uninvolved in its ministry. So when a ministry leader misses, they are immediately called. Ministry leaders are expected to inform ahead of time when they will miss and to make arrangements for their ministry in their absence. In the case of an immediate problem (car wreck on the way, family member suddenly in hospital, unavoidable immediate work conflict), they should inform as soon as possible. That is the only appropriate way to handle it. If they are making a habit of missing, they will be asked to step aside from their ministry leadership until they can be faithful to it. Again, leadership has requirements, and if you can't be there, you can't lead.
As for calling people, I generally don't call on the first absence (unless they are a ministry leader). Members will generally be called after the second week, though in such cases, I am rarely the first one to call them. All are contacted prior to four weeks of consecutive absence. Visitors is different. Usually I will calll a visitor after their first visit to thank them for coming and ask if there are any questions. That is trying to build a relationship with them. With a visitor that has been coming for a while that misses, I will call them after a couple of weeks of absence.
As for how many times I will call, again it depends on a number of factors including their history and receptivity to the calls. There have been people that I don't call anymore because they are not receptive or show no interest.
It's not really the pastor's job to do this. It is the member's job to do this. Someone else should be making these calls. The people that they are close to in the church should call them, and make the contact.
So for me, it's really a "play by ear" kind of situation.
But the bottom line is that membership means something. And it has fallen on hard times in this individualisitic culture that thinks every thing revolves around personal schedule and personal convenience. Mark Dever at Capitol Hill Baptist Church and
www.9marks.org has some great stuff on this. We would do well to recapture a vigorous and vibrant church membership.
When we become Christians we are adopted into God's family. As somone else has already mentioned, the church is people. May I ask you a few questions? (But of course, I'm not prying into your business - if you don't want to answer that's fine). Are you a member of the church you are talking about, or do you just attend services? If you are a member (or perhaps even if your are not), have you ever mentioned to the pastor/elders/deacons the problem you find with the weeknight meetings? If you have, did they just ignore you?