I would obey the Scripture I quoted from Proverbs and defend my family. I consider love for my family to be a higher love Biblically than love for a wicked intruder who wishes to kill my family. There are heirarchies of love: God, family, neighbor, enemy.What would you do? A violent intruder attacks you and your family. You love God more than them and your enemy as your own self. If the enemy kills you or your family you go to heaven. But if you kill your enemy he goes to hell.
So, if I kill the man, have I sent him to Hell? Absolutely not. He has sent himself there by his choices in life. But I will say, if there is opportunity, I would first witness to him of Christ. The Gospel is powerful, and may penetrate to his heart.
Your position puts a crazed killer to be more worthy of love than your family.